iHate This
by Ihearu
Summary: Sam reflects on her past and soon is confronted with a shocking secret that makes her world implode. Seddie/Creddie Triangle FTW
1. Lovers Love, Liars Lie

**Okay, so originally I had a whole new plotline going for this story. I began reading into all of the secret Seddie relationships, Carly's reaction and what not and it made me think, what if this was reversed? And then I just added on and on. Wish me luck with this story, guys, as in 15 days i'm going to be in college and have much more of a tough time uploading new stories. Let me know your opinions and suggestions, and i'll be extremely stoked****!**

**A/N: I do not own these characters like Dan Schneider does, and it makes me stick my tongue out & pout a lot. BOOO. **

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I never used to be such an angry person.

I used to be inseparable from Melanie, and we would practically be the same in one personality.

The day my dad left us, things changed.

My dad loved us, he claimed, but he loved some other woman more than my mother. I became angry, bitter, confused. Six years old and your father changes your life so dramatically, you can't help but be frustrated.

Melanie rolled with the metaphorical punches but things began to go awry when she decided to visit daddy dearest for her birthday. Mom was a wreck, and i was outraged. We were seven years old, and supposed to share our seventh birthday together, not with the person who left us and cared less about us. I spent that day sitting around with my mom, who didn't feel like celebrating just one kids birthday. I received zero presents. When Melanie returned the following week, she had her gifts fedex'd in; sharing how the woman dad married found him some high class job that paid really good.

The following holiday, Easter, she was sent an air ticket to our fathers house, to spend time with him. She hopped and skipped around, waving her ticket in the air like it could get her into the Fat Cakes Factory. I yelled at her, saying she was stupid for caring about someone who didn't care for us and that she should go there and stay there.

Soon enough, the phone was ringing and my parents were yet again arguing, as Melanie wanted to go to a private school near him, and he would pay. All I could think about was the amount of presents she was getting there, not the fact that she would be leaving. When the following week came and it wasn't melanie that came, but a truck coming to pack up and ship all of my twin sisters things away, i bawled my eyes out.

Two of the most important people to me left me.

Was I doing something wrong?

I thought so, and thats when my demeanor began to change. My mother was already gone from who she used to be. She began dating a different guy every week. She would hardly have enough money to feed us, and from time to time i'd go to sleep hungry.

I met Carly on one of those days. We were young, I wanted her sandwich. I had already began acting impulsively, getting into fights with boys and such who would gossip about my family. When Carly pushed me back off of the seat for her sandwich, we were instantly friends.

I kept having my mom drop me off at her house so often that she quit taking me and i learned to walk there myself around the age of nine. Takes about a half hour by foot, but I'd rather be there than with my manic depressive mother.

One day around the age of eleven or twelve, upon walking into the lobby, a small bruin haired boy was being dragged upstairs by his mother.

"Ma, I don't wanna live here! Its not fair! Lets go home!"

"Freddie! We must! Its closer for my job and we don't need all that extra space nowadays."

As i walked curiously far behind them, i noticed that they were going into the vacated apartment that used to be home to a couple with a young baby; lucky them found a new home to expand their family into. (Yes, i was extremely jealous)

I knocked on their door cautiously and Carly was eager to welcome me in.

"Did you see the new neighbors?"

"Yeah, about that. No one good, some boy, he's got major cooties."

She frowned. "You met him already?"

"I saw him. He looks kind of nubby." Kind of cute, too. But I don't mention that. All the guys in my life betrayed me so far, so what difference is another boy going to make?

Spencer begins putting together random items from their apartment into a basket, a typical Spencer Shay housewarming gift.

"Come on, Sam. Lets go meet them!"

She dragged me across the hall as we peered into an apartment of boxes and movers.

"Freddie! Don't you dare lift that box, its way too heavy for you!"

"Mom! It hardly weighs a thing!"

I looked over at Carly.

"Thats them."

The young boy becomes frustrated at his mother and walks away, then noticing us standing in the doorway.

The boy is cuter by the second, and the way he gets angry makes me extremely interested to know more about him.

"Hi! My name's Carly Shay and I live across the hall with my big brother Spencer. And this is my best friend-"

"Don't you DARE say Samantha!"

"-Sam Puckett."

He's grinning wide, ear to ear, and I don't understand it.

"My name's Freddie Benson. We just moved here from outside of Seattle. I'd like to go back but my mom had different ideas…"

And Carly being all Carly-like starts chirping questions and he's giving enthusiastic answers like they're old pals.

She hands him the basket Spencer made up, and he says thanks politely but is confused by what it holds. Eventually he's going to understand, but right now, not so much.

Then I begin to really notice it when I realize this kid didn't ask any questions to me. He likes Carly, not me.

"Freddie!"

"Yes, Samantha?" He acts shaken from the trance, as if he forgot I was there.

Carly's eyes go wide in shock, while mine narrow. Nobody calls me Samantha, only my dad did. This kid was cute, but he crossed the line when he paid zero attention to what I earlier instructed.

I pulled him by his hair out into the hallway and pushed him against the wall.

"Nobody, and I mean, NOBODY, calls me Samantha. Got that? You're no exception to the rule." And with that, I slam my shoe into his shin, leaving him howling in pain.

"Sam!" Carly begins to scold. She walks over to the boy and helps him up, using her as a crutch to walk over to his couch and sit.

He's glaring at me and i'm snarling back, growling profane words under my breath.

"I guess we'd better leave. I'll see you around, and I'm right across the hall if you need anything."

With that, she hugs him, and I can see the way he melts in her arms.

Carlotta Shay had always, always won the guys over. She was just all cupcakes and stuffed animals, innocence is bliss.

I didn't let people in that easy. If they made comments on my family, I would be throwing punches in seconds. If they remarked on how my grades were, how I dressed, or how they wished I was Melanie instead, they better check and see how much blood they lost or how many bones they broke when I was finished with them. I wouldn't show any mercy.

As I was pulling Carly from the apartment, Freddie stuck his tongue out at me, which i gladly reciprocated.

Back in the Shay apartment, Carly was yelling at me for being so mean to such a nice boy; what did he ever do to you? He made a simple mistake blah blah blah.

She wanted me to apologize. I told her I taught him a lesson. She gave up easy that day.

The next few days, the small boy kept following us EVERYWHERE.

He would ask Carly if she needed anything, if she wanted to date, etc.

Carly eventually shoo'd him away, and keeping me around just helped her cause, as he was usually too afraid to come near me.

Then the whole Mrs. Briggs talents show thing happened, and iCarly suddenly created new beginnings for all three of us.

Freddie and I transcended from enemies to frenemies to friends.

Right now, as the friend status is upheld, things are very edgy.

If Carly would've never stepped in front of the taco truck, Freddie wouldn't've saved her, and Carly wouldn't've realized how she feels in contrast to the past. Now she's still feeling something and time is running thin before she brings it up to Freddie.

But after Freddie and I kissed, i've loosened up acting so violent. I can sense something different from him than before. I still use all the nicknames I can create , but I'm starting to think that in the very, very back of my mind, i've been using them as a way to get closer to him. Freddie is my other best friend, although i'd never admit it. He and i just clicked right, in tune perfectly with each other. He could finish my sentences, predict my next move.

Freddie was my little singing partner, easy to mess with, but harder to admit the truth.

Til today.

SPFBSPFBSPFBSPFBSPFB

"Sam?" Freddie squeaked, seemingly nervous, looking everywhere but at me.

"What, Freddork? Can't you just enjoy the moment that we had another epic show? The ratings are off the chain!"

"Uh, No. Not really. I can't properly celebrate…"

"Freddie! Not now!" Carly says to him in a hushed voice.

I raise an eyebrow, confused.

"Sam… We've always said no secrets, right?"

Carly's hand goes to her face as she shakes her head, eyes closed.

"SPIT IT OUT!"

"FreddieandIaredating!" Carly screams, unable to hold back any longer.

I nod my head, focusing on breathing. It just hurt to breathe.

"For two months now."

I stopped nodding abruptly at Freddie's statement, half in shock - I forgot how to breathe - and half in anger.

I start screaming at the near top of my lungs, sputtering words at Carly in italian, and swearing at Freddie afterwords in spanish. (you should've seen how big his eyes were, how low his jaw dropped)

I stomped down the steps, one by one, making Spencer speed out of the kitchen to witness the fall out.

I slammed the door as hard as I could, which made Mrs. Benson speed to her door and when I was at the lobby, Lewbert screeched about my actions, to which i growled and snarled back.

Sam Puckett is not a weak person, no. Weak is going and acting like every other girl and go home and bawl her eyes out.

No. I had other plans.

I was sitting in the county police department, arms crossed, staring at a middle aged male officer, who eyed me up and down.

"Samantha Puckett. I see you aren't new to this facility we have running here. You know the rules, so why am I so surprised you're sitting across from me here at one o'clock in the morning?"

I pursed my lips tighter together, unable to answer the simplest of questions.

I had decided that I needed to take away some excess anger, blow off some steam so i ran pretty far and smashed my cellphone against a telephone pole some fifty or so times until I was certain the thing wouldn't beep again.

"Your friends were certainly concerned about you, Samantha."

"Not my mother." I muttered, hardly audible. It was more of a statement than a question.

"Well, she did call the station after your friends went to your house."

Typical. My mom usually didn't care about where I was or what I was doing, but if someone else alerted her to my bad behavior, she suddenly turned into Ms. Puckett, who cares of her daughter's 'well being'. In other words, it was all for show.

I didn't mind that bad, as long as I wasn't in trouble, I could fend for myself pretty easily, and I could at least go to Carly's to get food and friendship.

"So, when do you suppose your mother will be here?"

I laugh to myself. This man doesn't have a clue about my life.

"Whenever she gets done in bed with what ever guy she's with tonight. The doctor, lawyer, vet, dentist, chiropractor, ventriloquist, whichever one this time."

Ahem. The officer tugs at his collar, embarrassed and hesitant of what else to ask.

"Sam!" Spencer comes in, looking disheveled but seemingly relieved.

"Hey."

"Mr…" Officer whatever his nametag says cocks an eyebrow

"Shay. Spencer Shay." I was almost ready witness him doing a James Bond with the statement, but became surprised that he didn't.

"Seattle hardly condones runaways, and with this minor being past curfew, I can tell that she's very strong willed. Do you know of any information on when her mother will arrive to release Miss Puckett here?"

Spencer looks at the floor and scratches his arm, mumbling something I could't hear.

"What is it, Mr. Shay?" I finally realized that this man is seemingly exhausted.

"She.. well… said she wasn't coming."

My eyes widened. Not coming? This was a first.

Officer Seattle rubbed his temples as if this were a migraine in the making.

"Phone number, please."

I rattled off our home phone.

He sat there in front of us both, answering my mother as calmly as he could.

"Hello, Mrs. Puckett this is… I'm sorry, Ms. Puckett… You do? Alright well your daughter… Yes, we've acknowledged your lack of arrival. Yes, I realize it is one thirty in the morning. Night blindness? We could've arranged something if you had called the station… I'm sorry ma'm, I truly am trying to not be incon- yes. Yes, alright. A Mr. Shay is here. We will have to mail you the paperwork of tonights occurrence in the morning. Yes, I will do that… Are you sure? Um, that's highly unorthodox, wouldn't you like it if your daughter came- alright, alright. You may do that. I do hope to not have to speak with you on these terms again… Goodnight Ms. Puckett."

My mother was practically screaming through the phone. To tear her away from a boyfriend? Yikes. Comparable to tearing her daughter away from bacon.

"Your mother stated that she was unable to drive here due to night blindness… She asked if Mr. Shay could fill out her release papers and she would co-sign them when they arrive in the mail. She also requests of Sam returning to Mr. Shay's household."

I sank a little lower in my chair. I was feeling the pity emit from the poor, now half-deaf man.

After Spencer signed the papers, I was relieved to go with just a warning, although I knew the man just wanted rid of the problem.

He handed a little card to Spencer as I was walking away from them, I could only imagine.

I climbed into the passenger side of Spencer's car, and stared ahead as he followed suit, letting out a huge sigh after putting the key into the ignition.

"So, Mind telling me what that was all about?"

"Not quite." My voice kind of shrank, feeling like Spencer was acting the fatherly role, something I never really witnessed.

"Well. We need to talk. I saw your reaction to Carly and Freddie dating."

I cringed, fists balling up.

"Sam, come on. Big brother Spencer here. Responsible, hardly ever sets things on fi-welll, i did catch the sink on fire the other day, and there was the jukebox burning, and-" He shakes his head, "oh, yeah. Uh, Sam, you gotta talk to someone. You're stuck in a car with me for at least a half hour, and you'll be sleeping at our apartment tonight in the mean time. So i'm all ears kiddo."

I closed my eyes and leaned back.

"My mom really doesn't want me?"

He sighs and shrugs his shoulders. "I don't understand her sometimes, Sam. We were over there tonight and she was with some man who sold accordions and she told us she'd call the station to keep an eye out for you. Then she kicked us out."

"Why aren't the two nubs here?"

"They were going to come, but Freddie's mom insisted they stay. So she let them stay at his apartment, and you know Marissa."

"Did you know for this long?"

"Yeah. I found out pretty much the second day."

My mouth clamped shut after that answer. Even Spencer knew and he never told me.

"Sam, I'm sorry. I really am. I would've told you, but it wasn't in my place to tell."

"I guess."

"Uh, Officer Lincoln gave me this card, you know. If you need to talk to anyone besides us…"

"Councilors? No chizz. Ha, like mother dearest can afford it." I rip the card up in to itsy bitsy pieces.

His eyes focused on the road for the next few minutes, leaving me a little time to breathe.

"Which part do you hate more? The fact that they've kept this a secret from you or the fact that they're dating?"

"Spencer, please. Just get us home. I'm tired." And grumpy. And my stomach's empty. And I was not looking forward to the following morning.

I closed my eyes, leaned against the window.

The next thing I know, "Sam, we're here."

Bushwell Plaza.

"I'll sleep in the iCarly room on the floor, okay Spence?" I yawned, trudging my way through the doors as I notice a passed-out Lewbert behind the desk counter.

He shakes his head, rubbing his eyes, telling me he would make up the couch for me.

The keys jingle as he struggles to get the right key to open the door.

I just use good ol' common sense to open the door.

I turn the knob and step inside lazily, until i notice the couch.

"You have got to be kidding me."

There are Carly and Freddie, curled up on one end of the couch, tangled bodies and all, under a blanket.

Spencer struggles to make words, but I zip his lips for him and push him towards his bedroom.

I gingerly head up the steps to the studio, struggling to comprehend what may have happened with the two of them.

As my head fills with raunchy ideas that make me dizzy and anger swelling deeper, I blackout into a dreamless sleep.

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**So? Ditch it? Continue it? The more ideas, suggestions and feedback I get, the more likely i'll update faster.**

**Lots of Love & Thanks in Advance;  
ihearu ! **


	2. You Oughta Know

_Hi guys! Chapter two here, I'm pretty excited about my determination. I wrote this in about two days. One, the day after the last chapter, and two - majority of this story - today. I woke up late, around noon from insane dreams that felt like they took ages in time, and became writing inspired! I have ten days left before I go to college, so hopefully I can work on this story enough before I go that'll keep you guys happy. Oh! and its my birthday tuesday (the tenth!) & I turn eighteen. Birthday reviews pretty please? Best present ever! _  
_Enjoy! & **no, I don't own any of this.**_

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Chapter 2: You Oughta Know

When I wake up, groggy and confused, I immediately reach for my phone.

And then it hits me. I'm at Carly's, and all thats left of my phone is my sim card.

I trudge carefully to the bathroom, nervous for crossing the couple's path.

I make it to the bathroom with success for once, noticing that the couch is empty. Mrs. Benson must've had a fit.

I open the fridge and search for some quick food I can eat.

I hear footsteps behind me, and I swing around, bracing myself to see Carly.

"Sam."

"What the hell, Benson? Why are you here? Your mom must've had a panic attack when she didn't tuck you in last night."

"I slept on the couch in Carly's room." Oh, i'm so sure it was the couch. "Why aren't you home? Isn't your mom pissed about your 'little stunt'? Why'd you run away, Sam?"

I narrowed my eyes. "You ask way too many questions."

I push past him and curl my knees to my chest, balancing a lemon in my left hand.

He plops down beside me, arms crossed.

"Sam, c'mon."

I stand up, agitated and hardly able to contain my frustration.

"You know, Benson, take a hint. I don't wanna talk about it, I don't wanna deal with you and your precious girlfriend Carly. You can count me out of iCarly, and you can count me out of your friendships."

I squeeze the lemon in my hand hard, ready to throw it at his face, but where my nails dig into the fruit, the tart juice squirts into his eyes instead. Oh well, same effect.

"Sam!" The way he says it is hardly angry, but more upset.

I take a bite into the sour lemon, force myself to swallow the bitter taste.

"Tell Spencer thanks, and not to worry. I'l be in school tomorrow."

As I was closing the door, Freddie was staring at me, saying "You can't run away from everything."

I took off, knees aching from all of the running i'd been doing. I stopped at the Groovy Smoothie, it was hardly occupied.

"T-Bo!"

"Sam Puckett. Why you here at eight am? I thought you didn't rise til noon."

I shrugged and sat down, as he placed a smoothie next to me.

"Wanna buy some bacon on a stick?"

"Now you're talkin."

I looked into pocket to pull out money, and realized I was down to my last five bucks.

"Here!" I threw the money at T-Bo, and he glanced at it, questioningly.

Handing the stick of bacon and a Strawberry Splat to me, he also sets down four fifty.

"What? T-Bo, I think you forgot how to count."

"I KNOW how to count, Sam. My great granduncle taught me to count, okay? Thats a dollar twenty five in change."

"No, its not. It's four fifty." I was confused now, what was wrong with his head?

"You seem to forget that this place isn't even open on sunday mornings this early, kay? I know how to count at eight am. You're hurting my feelings!" He pouts, and walks away.

I leaned over the table, nibbling on the bacon, thinking about my situation. I was going to have to head to the house to gather some things up. I reminded myself to grab my bank statement, I wasn't stupid. I just needed time to get on my feet.

A little voice was nagging at me in the back of my head 'why are you so upset'?

It's Freddie and Carly. Two people I trust with my life. I tell them nearly everything.

I was feeling something else about the situation, but I couldn't place my mind on it. A little voice just kept saying its "Freddie and (HER)." But i blocked it away, I dismissing it for anger instead.

Finishing my smoothie, I walked down the street, in the direction of our home.

As I see my mom's car in the driveway, I begin to brace myself. I wished I could take the keys, but I knew the second the car left the driveway, mother dearest would have the cops after me.

Quietly shutting the door behind me, I could hear my mom talking to someone in the living room.

I tried to tip toe to my room, but her screech, "SAMANTHA!" left me involuntarily trudging back to the middle of the main floor.

"What is wrong with you? I had your little friends here, looking for you, wondering where you disappeared to. I had the coppers callin me again, girl. I'm not dealing with this bull. You think you can just run off like that? I trust you enough to go to that girls house all the time. But look at you now? Causin trouble, just like your daddy did. Disgusting."

I swallowed down the bitter feeling. I was constantly a disappointment to her. I had begun to feel like Melanie was the one she was always proud of, until Melanie decided she liked dad better, staying with him when she had holidays off of school, coming home here around twice a year.

I began to walk off, but i failed. "Hey, girlie, I wasn't finished talking yet!"

I winced and turned back around.

"This is Bruce. He's a guard at that nice little bar down the street. He also sells accordions! He was kind enough to stay with me last night, so the least you can do is pay respect to him"

I shivered, and raised an eyebrow at the man, who didn't seem to care whether I was there or not. I mumbled a hello, and he nodded.

"Now, get your crap and get out of here. I'm sick of seeing your face, causing trouble to this family's name. If you have no respect for me and Brucey here, you don't deserve this place."

My jaw dropped a little bit. "Mom? You're kidding me here. I just had a bad night!"

"Yeah, and I had a bad marriage, bad pregnancy. We learn to deal with things, not run away from them." I look at her like she's crazy. She makes zero sense, and her shoving all three of us from her life just makes things worse. And she used Freddie's words, ones that she's a hypocrite for. I'm the only thing she has left, because at the end of the week, she's done with whatever guy that she had her ways with and is racking up the credit cards, buying meaningless things for herself with the money we don't have. She used to come to my room and cry and apologize, but the next day, "Sam! Come meet fill-in-the-blank! He's a doctor-lawyer-bartender-whatever I could find to get laid and buy me food and drinks!"

I don't mean to sound negative. I mean, six days of the week, she's a generally happy person. But she acts like I don't exist. She pulls down some of our pictures and pretends that I'm adopted, or her niece or best friend's kid. She'll lie in any way to get some guy to stick with her temporarily.

I sprint to my room, grab my white and black checkered backpack and begin to stuff things into it. My pearbook pro laptop, bought for me from a rich man of the week who actually appreciated my company. A pearpod, gifted to me when some guy used it as a "i'm sorry I can't put up with you" peace gift for their breakup, which my mom threw at me. She didn't need technology, she just needed a man's company, she'd say. Various pairs of worn pants and Penny T's I had stashed from the few bucks I saved up from borrowing money. Other things; fat cakes, a few pictures from the years of iCarly and growing up. How long was I going to be gone? Was I ever coming back? I grabbed my bank statement from under the desk drawer, carefully tucked away so my mother wouldn't take it and blow the money I had been saving from holidays and birthdays, the few times relatives would send me money; they knew it wasn't pretty here.

I start pulling things from my pockets in search of gum, but then I realized the little plastic piece of infinite memory resided in my pocket. My phone's sim card.

I snapped my fingers and searched under my bed for the extra phone Melanie left for me. When the pink slim plastic with a thick cord wrapped around it reached my fingertips after minutes of digging, I relaxed. I wasn't planning on using it anytime soon, but if I needed it, it was going to be with me.

After taking a long hard look at my room, I inhaled deep and shut the door.

I could hear my mom and her boy of the week being disgusting in the living room, so i rerouted through the kitchen, grabbing a few pieces of food before leaving the house completely.

My heart was beating rapidly and my breaths came out raspy and labored. I was kicked out, and had no where to go.

I was smarter than last time, knowing to avoid causing a scene and staying away from major streets. Incognito, of course.

I'd be at school tomorrow. Franklin would call home if I didn't show, and Carly and Freddie would come looking for me again.

Where to go, where to go. I needed a place to sleep, to figure out where to go from here.

Walking to the nearest park, I sit on the swings and watch the little kids run around, screaming and laughing. Parents everywhere chasing them, trying to control them or round them up to go home.

And then it hit me.

I'm homeless.

I began shaking, trying to breathe. I made one irrational decision and my life was falling apart at the seams.

Freddie Benson, I hate you right now.

As soon as that thought crosses my mind, I close my eyes and think back of everything that's been happening through the ages. I knew him and Carly were still talking, but he tried to date that other freakishly tall chick, so i believed he moved beyond that. Apparently not.

Freddie and I have been really close friends, teaming up over things with Carly hardly as involved as we were.

When all three of us promised no more secrets, I knew the rule was for Freddie and I, because Carly was blatantly jealous when finding out the truth.

Maybe I didn't want her to know the truth because I predicted her reaction.

It's like saying, you don't know what you have until its gone.

Once Carly figured out the truth, things changed. These past few months, he and her have spent more time together, or maybe I realized they spent less time with me.

Whichever it was, they were lying to keep me from knowing the truth.

If they would've told me the truth from the beginning, maybe I wouldn't be this… freaked out.

Maybe.

Opening my eyes, I can feel sun burning my skin and I begin to walk away from my previous spot.

"Sam!"

I feel a pair of arms wrap around my midsection and i look down.

I couldn't help but smile. "Hi Guppy."

Seconds later, Gibby's standing in front of me.

"What are you doing here?"

"What's it look like? Its a public park. I'm allowed to be here." I say, slight sarcasm in my voice.

He rolls his eyes. Lucky boy, if he was Freddie, i'd knock his lights out.

"Carly keeps texting me, talking about you. I tried calling last night, but all I got was your voicemail."

"No chizz, diphthong. I broke my phone."

He nods, as if he knows this by now.

Guppy begins pulling on my hand leading me on a walk over to the slides.

"So you knew too?" I ask Gibby, not saying specifics because it disgusted me too much.

He nods, and pulls a sad smile on his face. "Yeah. I tried to ignore it."

"Ignore it?" Gibby looks distraught, upset at this.

"Yeah, i liked Carly a lot. She just wouldn't pay attention to me. Why else would I be trying to lose this weight?"

I looked him over again. He had been trimming up pretty nicely.

"I'm sorry. How did they tell you?"

He shook his head, a slightly disgusted look on his face. "They didn't."

"But then how-" I started to ask, and he cut me off.

"I walked in on them one day, kissing." He shakes his head, cringing. Then I realized, I was mirroring his expression. "You know Tasha and I broke up because of her?"

"But I thought you liked Tasha?"

He nods, looks down at the ground, "but I never got over Carly."

I almost scream at him, angry. "You sound like Freddie."

His eyes open wide and he realizes the actuality of my words. "Gross. Maybe I should become a ladies man, start finding new chicks, ya know?"

I nod, have a short laugh. Whatever you say, kid.

"Sammy!" Guppy runs over to me, with a fist full of flowers. "Feel better!"

I almost start crying, feeling grateful for this little kid.

"Do you need a ride home?"

I was about to lie, uneasy with telling Gibby the truth, but then I realize lies are what ended me up here in the first place.

"I don't have a home anymore, Gibs. Mama Puckett the first kicked me out on the street. Apparently mothers don't like it when their daughters run away and get caught by the cops."

"Kicked out? Where are you gonna stay?"

I shrug my shoulders, as if it wasn't that big of a deal.

He shakes his head. "You can stay with us tonight. My mom won't care."

"Gibby, I can't do that. Thats nice of you and all but-"

"Sam, you said it yourself. You don't have anyplace else to go. Its supposed to storm tonight. You can't stay here. You can't get caught by the cops tonight. And I know that you really don't wanna stay at Carly's or Spencer's.

"Just for tonight?"

"Just for tonight."

I nod, and lean down to Guppy's height.

"I guess we're havin a sleepover tonight, Gup."

"Sleepover! Yay!" The little boy starts to run around, fists pumped up in the air.

Thank goodness for honest friends.

(LaTeR.)

i'm laying on the couch, watching TV. It's about ten or so at night, everyone's in bed. Staying here weirded me out, I'm not used to a house that was.. normal. Little Guppy attached himself to me, showing me every inch of their house. "This is our cat! This is our kitchen! This is our door!" I ate with the family, politely as I could be, aiming to not be piggish, although Gibby gave me the rest of his plate when he was full. It was nice, but awkward. I couldn't impose like this beyond today. Tomorrow, I'm going to have to figure out something new.

Digging in my backpack, I pull out the spare phone. Bracing myself, I slide the SIM card into empty space, click the battery in, and hold the end button to turn it on.

As soon as the welcome screen came on, my phone began vibrating. '16 missed calls, 22 unread messages, 5 voicemails.'

I held the phone up to my ear after punching in my code, and shakily began listening.

"Sam, Its Carly! Listen, I'm sorry, I didn't want Freddie to tell you until we figured out the best time. Where are you?"

"Carly again, I'm serious, Sam. Come back, or call us. We're really worried here. I'm really worried here."

"Hi Sam, It's me (Spencer). Well I'm sure you know who it is, it comes up on caller id and you can tell by the tone in my voice, as my tone is different and I've known you since- "SPENCER!" oh, right. Let me know where you are asap. We're going to your mom's house, Freddie and Carly are really worried."

"Hey Sam, its Gibby. Carly told me to call you? I'm sorry about what happened. Just call or text us to let us know you're okay."

"Sam. I'm sorry. I didn't think you'd care. I just didn't want to keep it a secret. I don't want you to be angry with me or Carly. You're our best friend. I called your mom today. She says you're gone, and she, well, uh. She says she doesn't care if you come back. I'm sorry, Sam. I know you don't have a phone right now, but. I just want to let you know, you're important. To iCarly, to Carly - who's been hysterical about you leaving- , and to me. You're my good friend. Call us."

Freddie's voice left me feeling upset.

Good friend.

Thats all I was, a good friend? Not his first kiss? Not the one who shared thanksgiving with him? Not the one who worked on half of our iCarly webvids? Not the one who was in my Spanish class with me, tutoring me in both Spanish and how to work the iCarly cameras?

Damn it.

I'm jealous.

* * *

_Ah, before anyone asks me, I'm not going to do any Sibby. It suits them better to be friends, and it works against a too angsty Sam; she deserves to at least half one friend (one & a half if you count Guppy! ) _

_Let me know what you guys think, provide me with some stellar inspiration! _

- iHearU.


	3. Walk On Water or Drown

**A/N: Hey! I'm back, after a lot of trial and tribulation. I just moved into college! Today I finally got my Microsoft Office software for my Macbook, and I was stoked so I finally finished this chapter, which was saved in textedit. It's a bit harsh from Sam at a few points, but it's Sam, what do you expect? Let me know what you think after you read!**

**Disclaimer: If I owned the rights to this show and characters, I wouldn't be writing here, would i?

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Jealous of what?

Freddie and Carly have everything I don't.

Food on their tables, a bed to sleep in, people who love them.

They're happy.

(That's all, right?)

I fell asleep reading the twenty-two text messages, the angry, frantic ones from Carly, minor ones from Spencer and Gibby.

When I woke up, from the frantic sounds of Gibby's mom chasing Guppy around to put a shirt on him, I realized that I needed to get ready for my day. I already said I was going to school today, and I don't want to disappoint anyone more.

Rolling off the couch, my phone fell on the floor and I picked it up, realizing I fell asleep reading the last few.

Just glancing at the screen, it read "Sam, you're important in my life. Call me."

_Freddie_.

I groaned realizing that I'd have to see him and Carly today. Together.

Yuck.

I somehow managed to detangle my obnoxious curly hair and have Gibby find me some food. Minor, but important.

Next stop, Ridgeway High.

SFPBSFPB

I head straight to my locker, stashing my overstuffed bookbag and fishing out my books quickly, in hopes of getting to class before being approached by Carly and Freddie.

"Sam!"

Great.

"Sam! Come talk to me! I'm sorry about keeping it a secret! Please? I remember how mad I was when you didn't tell me about you and Freddie's first kiss, so I understand, but at least now we're even! "

I stopped walking away from Carly at this point and turned in one quick motion.

"Even? You're kidding me, right? This isn't the SAME, Shay. Far from it. That was a kiss, something we vowed to never tell anyone. It was over before we knew it." (**Lie**. It repeated in my head. Its the only kiss i've gotten. How sick is that?) "Remember what we agreed to after that?_ No more secrets_. So you've been keeping it a secret about your feelings AFTER you two dated once, and then never telling me about it! **Everyone** else i've talked to knew it! Don't pull that "_i'm sorry_" crap, I'm done. Screw you, Carly. And your boyfriend too. Oh. Wait, that's right. You two've probably done it already and kept that from me too." My eyes must've been darting out flames by now, I was so angry, my breaths came out heavy.

Carly, on the other hand, looked like I slapped her in the face. I could see tears in her eyes.

I felt guilty about it for a split second, but for months, keeping that big of a secret from me? That's **wrong**. That's not something an alleged "best friend" would do.

Yeah, i'm ticked. I can't help it. Wouldn't you be?

The first half of the day goes on without a hitch. I was expecting something ridiculous like being paired with Freddie or Carly on a project, but I was safe when it came to that.

Lunch? Different story.

I walked in, grabbed a pile of food, swiped my free-lunch card, and head off in the direction of my usual table, but then my walk slows, and I realize I can't do that. I glance over, and there's Carly and Freddie, hand in hand, and judging by the motions Carly's making, she's explaining to him what I said this morning.

I switch it up and go sit in a corner table that's always used for pulling chairs from. Empty, as usual.

I unwrap a fatcake and close my eyes, enjoying comfort food.

_'Clack Clack'_

A tray, set down next to mine.

I open my eyes, and there he is.

"Hey." Freddie calmly says, staring at me.

I close my eyes, still munching on the sugary treat.

"I heard what you said to Carly."

_No shit shirlock_. She's your girlfriend, she's gonna tell you everything.

I shiver. Girlfriend? Make me puke.

"Sam, we have iCarly soon. I know you said you quit and all, but i need something to tell our viewers."

I turned away from Freddie, disgusted.

"Fine. I'll just make something up."

And with that, I hear his chair squeak, the tray next to me gone.

I couldn't believe that he didn't even try! He didn't ask me to help him out, didn't ask for my forgiveness, didn't try and patch things up with the three of us... Or even try to excuse the fact that they kept the biggest secret from me for months.

All he cared about was iCarly. Carly's show. _**Carly**_.

He didn't even attempt to help.

I guess that was a good thing.

With Freddie, I would've caved. He at least talks sense. He's the smart one, he's supposed to get it.

But he didn't even try.

It added another layer of anger and disgust; I was completely ready to cut them out of my life.

An ache inside my chest told me I was just being bitter, but I counteracted that thought with the realization I just had to rely on me myself and I.

I went through the rest of the day doing my work and paying attention in class. Hey, it's not the usual Sam Puckett, but it's a roof over my head for 7 hours.

I understand that I can't take advantage of Gibby's house longer, I don't wanna be a freeloader. I could do that with Carly when she was my best friend, but Gibby's just a friend. Any more time I spend there, he's going to end up reporting back to Freddie and Carly.

I see Gibby in the hall, and then a plan forms in my head.

"Hey Gibmeister!"

"Sup Sam?"

"I just wanted to thank you for helping me out and all that chizz. I've found another place to go tonight though." He tilts his head, more than likely wondering who I'm possibly friends' with that will take me in.

"Who?" Ah, right on cue.

"Uh, a family friend. Don't worry about that though. I wanted to talk you about something else. You know how iCarly is one man short?"

"Sure. You quit, temporarily."

"Not temporarily. Full time. Never going back. The groupies can deal with it. But, you can help out the show and the viewers. They always say, "Have more Gibby!" so I think you should take my position." There, take over for me. **I** **need to be replaced in their life**.

I saw the emotions in Gibby's eyes run over, slightly surprised but amused.

"Sam, really? Me working with Carly? I mean, I don't know if I'm still over her. And she'll be around Freddie and being all… you know. _Flirty_."

I cringe, and so does he. Ew.

"I don't know Gib. It's only for like 2 hours a week. You don't have to live with them. I kinda feel bad for abandoning my viewers, but you'd definitely reel em back in."

He shrugs, still considering, so I continue, "Well, you could set some boundaries. They won't wanna lose you too, so you can tell them straight up, you won't stand for anything."

He finally agrees, and I tell him to go after Freddie.

"One last thing." Ah, I remember now. "Yeah?"

"Don't tell them it was my idea."

He nods, shooting me a sympathetic glance. I feel pathetic. "I'm _really_ sorry about everything, Sam."

"Yeah. Me too."

I leave the building and begin to roam. Where can I possibly go?

Last resort. Just me, my shoes and my pack on my back; I don't know where I turn.

I look down at my phone, and realize **I'm at my last resort**.

I scroll through my contacts list, and press the call button.

"Hello?"

"Hey."

"Sam! How are you? What have you been up to? You haven't called me forever? Is something wrong? You never call! What happened?" Melanie's voice griped me. I wasn't liking the thought of calling for favors, I'm independent. But… desperate times call for desperate measures.

"Yep."

"What happened?"

"Well, I'm not living at home anymore."

"WHAT? WHAT **HAPPENED**?"

"Uh, mom kicked me out. I got into a fight with Carly and got caught after curfew. Mom refused to pick me up, Spencer had to take me back to their apartment. When I went back home the next day, she was with another new boyfriend, and she kicked me out. For good. Told me to pack up my stuff and get out."

"Oh my gosh. Sam…"

"Don't. I stayed at Gibby's last night; I'm too pissed at both Freddie and Carly for what they did. I'll miss seeing Spencer, but I'm never going back in that apartment."

"What did they do?"

"They lied to me, for three months straight, about each other, about their feelings, about _everything_. They were supposed to be my best friends, and they pulled this crap."

"Yikes. That bites. But maybe you're overreacting a little?"

"You've gotta be kidding me. Do you want me to hang up the freaking phone right now?"

"No, no. Sorry. What do you need?" "Well. I need some place to stay tonight. I was gonna buy a hotel room, I've got the money, but I'm still a minor. I need someone to call and confirm…"

"You serious? You really want to use the number?"

"I have no choice. It's either the number or sleep on a park bench and get caught by the cops again." "Okay…" She recited off the number by heart, I dialed it down in my phone and saved it hesitantly.

"Stay safe, Sammy. I'm here for you anytime if you need me, don't hesitate to call."

"I know… I probably will more. I'm sorry I haven't stayed in touch too much, it's just been, well, insane around here."

She agrees, and we say our goodbyes and hang up.

I look up the number I saved and keep trying to get enough courage to call.

Finally, I press the key lightly, and the phone begins to ring.

"Hello?" The breath catches in my throat, my eyes begin to sting. "Hello? Is anybody there?"

"Hi, dad. It's your other daughter, Samantha."

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**A/N: I know that this chapter was tons of dialogue and is shorter than the other two, but I've been drabbling in and out of this chapter between the move to UT. Read and review! My classes just started today, so give me something to procrastinate to! **


	4. Half of My Heart

**A/N: Wow. You guys must hate me. Freshman year of college is so tough to get multitasking! These past few weeks have flown, I just finished my last midterm today, so I'm going to FINALLY give you what you guys deserve. Throw tomatoes, it was too long of a wait, along side of the fact that I had to force myself to write something lengthly. Goodluck. **

**P.S.; I don't own iCarly, or Holiday Inns.**

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Chapter Four: Half of My Heart

"Samantha? Sammy?" Shock and confusion rang out through his voice. I ignored it.

"Yeah, her."

Silence on the other line.

"I thought you would never call."

I grimaced, clenching my fist.

"Yeah, I never had a reason to. But I have no other choice."

"Yikes. Melanie was right about you, you really have changed."

I crossed my arms in defeat. Realizing he couldn't see my frustration, I just continued.

"Listen, your ex-wife decided that it would be better off for me to not live in her home. So I need your consent to get a hotel room."

Silence again.

"Pam kicked you out?" I could hear the surprise and the guilt in his voice, but I closed my eyes, pretending that the truth didn't hurt.

"Yes. So if you were kind enough, can you please just call the hotel and book the room? I have money from my savings for it."

"Of course. But you're not paying. Would you like a plane ticket? Come here, stay with us. Your mother… you're only a minor, Samantha."

"NO! You, you haven't even spoken to me since I was little! You left me with her! You took Melanie away with you! You don't even belong in my life! You have no right! I just need the hotel room! I'm fine on my own. After things get worked out, I won't need your 'help' any longer!"

We both remained quiet for a decent amount of time; this man would not win.

"What's the name of the hotel?"

I mumbled something about a holiday inn down the street with fairly low rates. He said he'd call back with information.

I sit back in the chair and digress from the situation.

Carly and Freddie lead to this. I can't help but blame them for me ending up homeless and alone.

_It's YOUR entire fault. _

My subconscious makes my head and heart hurt.

I didn't have to react the way I did, running away, getting the cops called on me.

While getting bored just standing, waiting, I soon ended up stumbling back into the park.

I can't get away, I guess.

Fumbling through my backpack, I pull out the informal connection to the world.

I flipped up my laptop, not expecting to get wi-fi, but surprisingly, I ended up ripping off someone's airspace.

, my curiosity was too tempting to stray me anywhere but there. I checked out the forums first, and there it was.

Posting from Freddie.

_As of late, Sam has resigned from our show. While we are not certain that it is permanent or not, we will still continue on for our important viewers, as they are worth more than the common cast drop. Your videos and input are what makes the show. Without our viewers, we'd be nothing. _

_-Freddie._

And there it was.

Out in plain sight.

I was written off, it was like survivor all over again.

A part of me wanted to say, it just wouldn't work. Scrolling down, there were many, many pages of upset viewers. I knew that my leaving would have a bit of effect on the show, but I didn't realize the whole truth behind the comments until I stumbled amidst the middle of the third page and found this.

_Omg! This is bcuz of wht happened after the last show! _

What? How do they know what happened?

Scrolling down with my face glued to the screen, I gasp in horror.

__ What do you mean?_

_I know most of the iCarly viewers logged out after they said their goodbyes and all, but who caught what happened AFTER they 'ended' their show?_

_OMG I KNOW!_

_AH, poor Sam. _

_Wtf is wrong with thm?_

_Damn, if I was Sam I wouldn't've stood for that either!_

_Creddie sucks! Seddie FTW!_

_Boycott iCarly!_

_I'm going to watch and see how bad their next ep goes without her and then give up on the show!_

Freddie. Freddie Mothertrucking Benson. He had to have left the freaking camera on and it just had to stream online what happened!

I had to have been steaming right now. I clicked on the splashface video link of the end of our broadcast, and there it was. Screaming in Italian and Spanish, stomping out, pissed.

Fredbag, of course, is pale and shocked, looking at Carly who won't even look at him.

He goes up to her, hugs her, and kisses her forehead, telling her, "We'll work this out."

She crumples to the floor, and he sits next to her.

"You know Sam, she's just probably in shock." Freddie aims to reassure her.

"It's not that, Freddie. I've been avoiding telling her for a reason. I always believe she'd get… jealous."

Are you serious?

"Jealous? I know it'd be hard for her to adjust to not being the centre of the universe. She wouldn't be a third wheel, she'd just be Sam."

Wrong.

"Freddie. No. Not of 'Us'. Of 'me'."

Her.

"What?" A beat or two passes. "oh."

They sit there for a while, and then a message pops up on the screen "airtime exceeded."

Well, shit.

That's just awesome.

I slam my laptop shut; shove it violently into my stuffed backpack. I'm shaking, violently.

I feel like I can't breathe, my eyes are wide.

I stare, trying to gasp out a breath, it sounds ragged, and all of a sudden, these sloppy, wet tears are pouring down my cheeks.

Gross.

Sam Puckett does not do emotions.

But look at what I've gotten myself into?

I sound like a sob story, something that you would find written in a bad novel. It was as if I looked for bad luck. Maybe it's karma.

Carly.

I can't believe what she said.

That's why she was so vague to me.

That's why she just wanted to forget it. Just like my first kiss, like how she found out.

And then, there was Freddie.

Freddie, the one who would have a new bruise everyday, something to have a story behind.

Freddie, the one who poured grape juice down the front of my white shirt when I kicked in his door the prior week.

Freddie, the one who **should** mean nothing.

But it turns out the iCarlies know more than I do.

I was happy they had my support, but I knew that seeing Gibby on board with probably minor appearance of little Guppy, people would stay. I know Gibby's not mean, but he's a regular on the show, our viewers have already taken a liking to him.

My phone rang in my lap, and I picked it up without hesitance.

"Samantha, I've arranged your hotel stay at the Holiday Inn. But I have to be honest with you. If your mother does not fix things within a week, I'm going to have to ask you to come live here."

"Are you chizzing me? I don't even KNOW you." I regretted that after I said it immediately.

"I know that it may be tough, yet it's child abandonment if I let you live in a hotel. Your mother is not a fit parent for you to stay with."

I was about to tell him that Spencer could be my guardian, or even Mrs. Benson. Until that split second was over and I was back to reality.

"I have a week? A week for mom to shape up or find a fit guardian."

I hear him sigh.

"Would living with me really be the worst thing? I miss you, Sam."

"You didn't miss me enough to contact me for the past eight years. Pass."

"Sam, we can talk about that later. But for now, get to the hotel and check in. I don't want my daughter wandering out in the middle of the streets, getting picked up by the cops." Again. Ha.

I hang up the phone.

What more could seriously go wrong?

Then, it began to rain.

Wow, this is **so** jank. I'm living in a melodramatic soap opera.

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**A/N: Ah, wow this chapter was the hardest thing to write. No joke. I believe I'm going to try to write in a different P.O.V. because at this point I feel like I'm struggling :/ Ah well. Reviews ? Comments, Questions? They equal brownies and gold stars for all! **


	5. Notes In Constellations

**A/N: I WROTE A CHAPTER IN THREE DAYS ! Uh, anyways. Colleges should give breaks more often. I'm mega productive this weekend! **

**A lot of it comes from my reviewers, I was stoked to read all of the reviews and was excited every time I looked at the reader count. **

**Without you guys, I'd be a tabula rasa when it comes to writing. **

**In this chapter, i attempted half Sam half Carly points of view. I'm not quite sure how i feel about it, but i'm feeling like the house is headed in the right direction.**

**I hope you guys enjoy!**

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Chapter 5: Notes In Constellations

I pulled out my phone regrettably and dialed Spencer's number. He answered on the first ring.

"Lewis and Seifford. I'm the girl getting drenched standing on the middle of the sidewalk. I owe you." I rush, without giving him a chance to lecture or ask questions.

I scour the street for an open awning, looking for the chance to dodge the bulleting raindrops. I stand under one of a vacant building, shivering and snarling at the chain of events.

Then there's Spencer, looking at me with a weird expression, motioning for me to get in the car.

"Sam. Are you okay?"

"Take me to the Holiday Inn, okay?" It's hard for me to hold eye contact with him; he makes me feel guilty for everything turning out this way.

"Sam, you can't stay there. Come stay with us."

"In case you weren't informed, Spencer, I am no longer welcome there. And I do not want to deal with her or him." I can't even say their names. It makes me feel more and more pathetic each time I think of it.

"Alright. I saw what happened when you found out about Freddie and Carly. But you're practically my little sister too. You've been at the apartment more than Carly, probably. So what makes everything so different now?"

"There's a big difference. I lost two of the people I trusted the most from a secret that is ridiculous. Then from being upset, I became homeless. And from being homeless, I had to become a pity case from the Gibsons for a night. From then, I had to do something I had no other choice to do; call my father. Did you know I haven't talked to him since he left us? When I was six! So now I'm getting to stay in a hotel for a week and if my mother doesn't magically become someone who loves me, I'm screwed. I get to be shipped off to my dearest daddy's house, to stay with him and his charming new wife; therefore ripping me from the only environment I've ever known. So yes, Spencer. There is a big difference."

Spencer takes his eyes off the road, and glances over at me, shock evident on his face.

"Am I really that bad of a person to deserve all of this?" I say, staring out the window to avoid direct confrontation.

"Sam, no! You don't deserve any of that! You've just been dealt terrible cards."

"All because of your lovely sister and that incompetent, hormonal boy." I try to make my tone as neutral as possible, but while pulling into the parking lot, I see Spencer's eyebrows rise.

"Before I drop you off, I need to tell you two things. I want you to listen." I nod my head for him to continue, "First. You are always welcome at the Shay living space any time. Although you've taken advantage of it in the past, now is the time for you to take full means of it, regardless of the feud that Carly and you have." I sigh, feeling as if he couldn't be more wrong.

"Secondly, no guy is worth it if they're going to hurt you like this. Freddie and you… well, I can't quite explain it. But if he's going to date Carly, you can't let it hurt you more than the initial blow. If you let it into your system, all you're gonna do is become depressed and unfocused."

"You say it like I'm in love with the kid." I mutter as I unhook my seatbelt, ready to evacuate the car.

He shakes his head, apparently irritated, but leans over and gives me a hug instead. "Promise me, no matter what, you'll keep me updated on what's going on in your life. Okay?"

"I promise."

I wave goodbye as he pulls away, and take a deep breath and enter through the sliding doors.

"Reservation for Puckett." Slamming my hands on the counter, the hotel attendant forced a smile, looking up at me.

"Aren't you a little young to purchase a night here? I need some identification, sweetie." The half balding man with a crinkled, tucked in shirt and shiny nametag that read "Robert" glances me over, skeptical.

"Listen man, my father called here, okay? He told me there'd be a room ready for me, and I've got the money." He raises an eyebrow, and an evident manager walks over.

"Ah, you must be Samantha. I'm sorry for the inconvenience, miss. Here's your key cards, the room's 2103, second floor, east wing." The manager hands over the key card, giving scolding looks to Robert-o for his lack of manners.

"Wait, what about the cost?"

"Prepaid for the week by Mr. Puckett. Enjoy your stay! Don't forget to come down to the complimentary breakfast or dip your feet into the pools!"

I was already rolling my eyes walking away, although my stomach was growling. Walking to the elevator, the chlorine smell stung my eyes as little kids ran around, shrieking and laughing.

The last time I'd gone to vacation with the whole family, Mel and I had to've been about four and we were at some random beach. Foggy, I can only remember shaped ice cream pops and screaming because I wanted more food at a buffet.

Mmm, buffet. My stomach growls once again, and I realize I need some food, fast. It isn't like me to give up eating under any circumstance. I pick up a room service menu and raise my eyebrow. If my lovely father was picking up the tab, I'm taking full advantage of it.

After eating a few plates of ribs, I pass out on the overly fluffed hotel bed, with soft rain falling behind my window.

_I walked through the hall of the school the next day, and it was strangely empty. I walked over to my locker, opened it up. Empty. _

_ That's strange._

_ I see a bruin haired girl pass me. Carly. _

_ "Carls? That you?"_

_ "Excuse me? Do I know you?"_

_ "Ha ha, Shay. Don't play stupid with me."_

_ "Excuse me? I need to get to class. I'm sorry for the confusion."_

_ What was that? Someone taps me on the shoulder, I swivel around in surprise._

_ Freddie's eyes pierce into mine, sending me into a series of frenzied shivers. _

_ "Freddie? What's going on?"_

_ Seconds pass, he stares unblinking. _

_ "I am Carly Shay's boyfriend. I will never be yours." As the words escape from his mouth in a monotone, expressionless voice, I feel myself jump in shock._

Woah. I woke up, finding myself in my own clothes and it to be about five o'clock in the morning. Weird.

I was ready to will myself back to sleep, but my body was telling me no. Instead, I took a long shower, dried my hair, pulled on some crinkled clothes from my backpack and even took some eyeliner to my eyes.

Public bussing to the school? Gross. But I wasn't walking twenty miles, thank you.

I walked the remaining three blocks from the bus stop to the Ridgeway High, and cringed walking to my locker. I don't see the bruin head there; it dawns on me that she's sharing a locker with him now.

A couple of people I've known from various classes gathered behind me.

"Hey Sam, are you seriously done with iCarly? For good?"

"Correct." I kept glancing to my side, looking for an out to escape their prodding questions.

"The show won't be the same without you!"

"Listen, kid. Gibby's gonna take my place. He'll do a great job."

"Yeah, but its different. Gibby's more clueless than you." Ah, I agree to a point.

I nod, staring back into my locker as if something is going to jump out at me.

"So this is all because of your crush on Freddie?"

I spun around so fast my hair smacked a few kids across their face.

"What did you just say?" I grit my teeth, staring down this kid in a menacing tone.

The girl cowers a little, but continues on, "I saw what happened after iCarly, how mad you were. I just believed that you wouldn't react like that unless…"

"UNLESS WHAT!"

Majority of the crowd scampers away, but this girl stands her ground. Gotta admit, that takes a lot of courage.

"Unless you had feelings for Freddie."

My face deadpanned, the girl shifts, glancing at the school's entrance, and then sprints away. There were Carly and Freddie, hand in hand.

Carly catches my eye first, and tenses up, dropping Freddie's hand.

She leans over to his ear and whispers something. His expression changes, and then I notice him roll his eyes.

All of a sudden, he's reaching and holding her hand once again.

I could feel my stomach clench, and then it was me who was rushing to get away.

**CARLY POINT OF VIEW::**

Freddie's grip on my hand was tightening with every second Sam stayed within our view.

I know I love him, but this whole ordeal is getting pretty ridiculous.

Sam used to be the one who would make fun of people avoiding each other, but now, she hates Freddie and me for withholding a very important detail.

_Freddie and I began dating the night following when my Utopia was destroyed; Sam bailed because it was too much 'work'._

_"You don't know how much this means to me." I say, blushing slightly._

_ "Come on, Carly. You know it was pretty much my fault in the first place. I was the one who brought her here." Freddie, the congenial, will always try to make everything better for the opposite person._

_ As he was literally picking up the pieces of my world, we kept reaching for the same models at the same time. Our hands touched._

_ When I accidentally dropped a small, decapitated person, I bent down to pick it up and so did he; we lightly bumped heads. _

_ Our eyes met, noses nearly touching. After I pulled away from being mesmerized, it's his turn to blush._

_ "So, about the girl. Do you think you'll date her again?" _

_ "Did you see how disastrous it was in the first place? She didn't even apologize to you anyways. How unkind."_

_ "Oh. I'm sorry…" I trail off, unsure of where to go from then. _

_ "Don't be." He half shrugs, aiming to reassure me. _

_ It's silence for a few moments, and then I decide to take the plunge._

_ "So. Does that that mean I'm back in the running to date you?" _

_ This statement alone makes his eyes bulge out. "Carly. You know the only thing that's changed? The fact that I'm not in a cast from head to toe. But what about you? Have your feelings changed?"_

_ I immediately shake my head, no. _

_ "Well then, Carly Shay. Would you be my girlfriend?" _

_ I had been waiting __months__ to hear that question._

_ "I wouldn't have it any other way."_

_ We just stand there, smiling dopey at each other; my head slightly thinks of last time, with wanting to kiss him._

_ "Can you do me a big favor though, Freddie?" _

_ Worry etches on his face, eyebrows furrowing, "What is it?"_

_ "We can't tell Sam about us, not right away. She thinks you're still bacon to me. I don't want her making another excuse and ruining what we both want. You do want this, right?" Flashes of scenarios appear in front of my eyes; hesitation on Freddie's end, word vomit in form of Sam would spew out, but instead…_

_ "I want this Carly. I want US. I've always wanted it. I will be happy to do anything you want as your boyfriend, and if you want this to be hush hush, okay."_

Did I make the wrong decision? A part of me believes that if I had told Sam, she would've managed better.

And then the larger part of me is saying, no matter who would have told Sam and no matter when she would find out, her reaction would be on the same caliber.

Sam's always been my best friend that's a girl. She's never been the type to react the way she has now; she's always taken the less girly approach. She'd rather take her aggression out on others through legit fighting, but this time, things are all off.

"You can't let her get to you like this, Carly. It's all a part of her plan. Remember? Sam just plots and plots until she can find ways to screw things up so everyone's unhappy except her." Freddie's voice fills my ear, and I can tell that he's not happy.

I look over at him, surprised. He was angry with Sam more than the fact Sam was angry with him. He avoided her just like Sam avoided us. He claimed he tried to talk to her once, about our mutual ground, iCarly, but she gave him the silent treatment.

She yells at me, yet gives him the silent treatment. I'm trying to piece it all together.

Is she really that much into Freddie?

As I sit down in my history class, I pay little attention to what the teacher writes on the board, and take mental notes on the situation instead.

Because I thought it was just one short first kiss and then done. Realizing they kissed? Well. It really made me readjust my perspective on where I stood with Freddie. I couldn't believe how jealous I was, more than the fact that they kept it from me.

But both of them acted like it wasn't a big deal anyway. I began realizing what a mistake I had made after Freddie was hit by the Taco Truck. He saved my life, yes, that meant a lot. But at the same time, all of those times I turned him down, what if I had chosen differently? Life's short, you gotta take chances when you can. Freddie wasn't some scrawny, squeaky voiced tech nerd like he used to be. He's muscular, his voice is deeper, and he cares about other things besides technology. That and the fact that he's majorly attractive made it ideal for me to have a huge crush on him.

I figured it out after analyzing and reanalyzing what happened when Freddie and I broke up. Sam only messes around with Freddie on a daily basis. She can hardly go a week without teasing him about something or other. When I really looked into this, I found out that this 'pigtail-pulling syndrome' is a result of a pent up crush.

Crush. As in, Sam likes Freddie. And judging from the way she treats him, she likes him a lot.

Okay, calm down, Shay. She's been abusing Freddie since day one of meeting him.

I want the chance to be with him, to kiss him, to be happy. I guess that if Sam can't truly be happy for us, lying aside, she's not being a good friend.

A text vibrates in my pocket, I glance around to see if I could get caught looking at it or not.

Spencer.

'Sam in school today?'

Ah. Big brother keeps playing the role to her and me lately. Last night, he ducked out for 'art supplies'. When he came back, empty handed, stuttering and evading the topic, I knew he was with Sam somewhere, but he certainly didn't let me in on where.

I understand, he's not gonna drop her like she dropped us, but I really wish I could know what he's helping her out with.

All of a sudden, I was forming a plan for when I approached Spencer at home.

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**A/N: Oh boy, Carly is so nosey! **

**I'm hoping I can pump out another chapter soon, but I know inspiration always helps!**

**& Remember, iHearU (: **


	6. We R Who We R

**A/N: Long time no see! Man, I've missed the writing world. I've become so inspired lately, but my course load has unfortunately lead a downfall of updating. Recently, I've had a (to quote Jimmy Neutron) "Brain Blast". I hope you enjoy!**

_Chapter 6: We R Who We R_

The next few days dragged on more than I could believe. I kept running away whenever I saw Freddie and Carly together. It's been a long time since I've received a text from Carly and Freddie still hasn't said anything since the first school day. Each day has been harder than the next. It's been really weird to walk to classes alone.

The only nubbish quality I incorporated is the fact I threw myself into my schoolwork. It sounds un-Sam-like (when have I ever cared before?) but it feels like the only thing I can control right now. You should've seen the day I raised my hand with correct answers in my psychology class. Everyone's jaws dropped, and the teacher literally had to sit down and compose himself before he could continue the class. It's not the fact that I'm not smart; it's just the fact that I never had a reason to drive myself to learn. I figured I could slip by, copying little things, and make it big in the world through iCarly. But without it, I can't quite get anywhere. Without Carly and… him, I want to get into a college far away, where no one will care about "Sam Puckett, the rejected iCarly co-host".

I know it's supposed to be easier, but knowing that each day brings me closer to departure to my dad's house freaks me out. He keeps calling to check up, as if somehow things will magically get better between my mom and I. But I can tell, he's worried. I know that he's thinking one thing and one thing only. 'I'm going to have a mini Pam Puckett here.' The thought of it just makes me cringe. If it were Melanie that was supposed to go home to daddy dearest, he'd be welcoming her with open arms. She's the good, innocent and perfect one. I'm the troubled twin.

It's the day of a new iCarly coming out. Before Gibby is instated as the new co-host, before I'm banned forever from the iCarly world, forgotten forever. I'm far from thrilled about it, but I'll watch for Gibby's sake. He's been a good friend through this, and I appreciate it. He's still hurt over Carly, but I honestly don't think he's ready to back down. Working with them only just helps the matter.

I become more and more lonely as the days pass. Without Carly to talk to constantly, and Freddie to get into mischief with, I was doing everything I used to alone. Gibby was testing the waters with iCarly rehearsals and show set-ups, he never really got alone time that I could pull him aside for. Spencer was my last resort, but even that wasn't going too well. He had a new account that he was working on, vigorously and sleeplessly. He had no time for me whatsoever. I got used to walking around the Holiday Inn, making acquaintances with the bellhops and cleaning ladies.

Setting up my laptop in front of me, logging onto the free wi-fi in the hotel, I closed my eyes, bracing myself for what would appear in front of me. Logging on to the Live Webcast, The screen popped up, with Carly and Gibby grinning at the screen.

"_I'm Carly!"_

"_I'm Not Sam!" _

What? WHAT? Are you **SERIOUS**?

Carly's expression changed from happy to shock.

"_Uh, well," Carly stutters, putting on a forced smile, "due to recent difficulties, I would like to welcome Gibby as our show's new co-host." _

Gibby presses a button on my remote, and boos come out.

Carly's face grew more into confusion, aiming to laugh it off,

"_Well, Gibby,"_ her face was plastering a pained smile, _"I think you pressed the wrong button."_ She snatches the remote away from him, pressing the button for cheers.

"_Oops. My bad."_ Weird. It didn't sound very convincing...

"_Well, here's a random clip of a boy pogo sticking while juggling eggs… upside down!" _

Video was played, and I could tell that behind the scenes, whispers were running rampant.

"_To further initiation of Gibby here, we figure we'll have a shorter show, and do our regular bits. So… onward with our favorite thing to do here at the iCarly studio, RANDOM DANCING!"_

The lights flashed, color wheels spinning. Gibby started dancing alongside of Carly; then doing the trademark Gibby shirtless move whipping his shirt over his head.

And then _all hell broke loose__._

As Gibby continued dancing shirtless, Carly glanced over at him, and realized that Gibby was toned. I mean he had gotten downright buff. Gone were the days of his baby belly and in came the instances of manly muscles.

Carly was **staring**.

I don't mean shifty glances from the camera to him, I'm talking stop-what-you're-doing-and-stare-at-his-body-endlessly. She was frozen; her eyes were fixated on Gibby. And of course, Gibby was clueless to everything as he danced around.

Freddie abruptly cut the music mid-beat and Carly snapped out of it, in turn, found heavy interest in a chip in the floor, cheeks flaming hot.

I heard a couple beeps; Freddie's face appeared on screen.

"_Gibby. Put your shirt on." _His voice dripped rage, although aiming to whisper.

He shrugs, getting his shirt back on, confused as to what he did wrong.

"_Well, __**anyways**__." _Gibby points his words;_ "lets get T-Bo and little bro out here." _

"_Um. Come on in T-Bo and Guppy Gibson!"_

T-Bo walks in with something on a stick, and Guppy tri-cycling in, hands behind his head as if to show of skill.

"_Alright, Mr. Bo. What's that on your stick today?"_ Gibby continues on, no hesitancy.

"_Well." _Pause_. "Hi mommm!" _

Freddie palms his face at this point.

"_Anyways. These are smoothies on a stick. They're the next big things." _ T-Bo grinned his trademark smile, as if it was so obvious.

All four sets of eyebrows raise, Guppy's included.

"_Explain_." Carly squeaks out.

"_I froze all my smoothies in Styrofoam cups for three days in the freezer! Then… guess what I did next!"_

Guppy was the only to answer with an enthusiastic "_What_?"

"_Then! I ran this metal stick through them! But you gotta do it quick or else you won't get the stick straight through!" _

"_That certainly is… creative. Where did you come up with this unique idea?"_

"_Well. Uh. Sam Puckett, of course."_

Silence erupted from the entire room.  
_"Okay. Thanks." _

"_Me next me next!"_ Guppy raised his hand as if he was in school, ready to be called upon for some important assignment.

"_Okay Gup."_ The brothers thumbs up'd each other, and Carly began speaking.

"_So Guppy. Do you like iCarly?"  
"Yes."  
"What's your favorite thing about iCarly?"_

"_Me bein on it."_

"_Who's your favorite cast member?"_  
Guppy looks over at Gibby, and starts laughing.

Carly breathes out a sigh of relief; she believes that it would be the new starlet, the big brother.

"_Sammy of course!"_

Freddie appears on camera. He doesn't smile. Doesn't tell the viewers something distracting. He goes up to Carly and whispers in her ear.

Carly turns to him, silently arguing something, and points to the camera, shaking her head.

"_Fine. Gibby. You give our viewers the ending." _

"_Well, I'm not Sam, but you can call me Gibby. And that's still Carly. And this was iCarly!"_ He smiles wide, winking at the camera.

The feed gets cut, and I sit for about thirty seconds, just staring at the screen.

Did that really just happen?

My phone vibrates in my pocket and I jump up.

**INCOMING CALL FROM: GIBBY**

Oh boy.

"Sam," It's Gibby alright, but he's whispering, "I don't have a lot of time to explain, but I'm putting this on speaker so you can't say anything, ok?"

"Ok." I'm shaking somewhat.

I hear a faint, but pointed, "WHAT WAS THAT?"

"What do you mean, Freddie?"

"Are you TRYING to sabotage iCarly?"

Gibby, in his normally confused manner, goes, "No, why would I do that?"

"Are you working for Sam? Is that it? Is that where all this comes from?"

"Where all what comes from?"  
Another sigh from Carly. She was just full of em today.

"Why didn't you stick to the script, Gib?"

"I did. We did intro, random dancing, interviews."

"NO. You did NOT have any reason to bring up HER in here. SHE doesn't belong in the show anymore."

"Who?"

"SAM!" It was as if all of his emotion built up like a volcano, and him spewing out my name was the full bursting eruption.

"Freddie."

"SAM screwed US over, and you're taking her side?"

"Freddie!"

"Sam's my friend. You guys are my friends too. What you guys did and were doing isn't fair."

"Well then get the hell out of here."

"FREDDIE!"

"WHAT?"

And then I hear her crying. Sobbing, more like it.

"Carly…" Regret fills his voice.

"Go away."

"Carls, please." This only makes her cry harder.

"I said go away!" She sounded miserable.

A door slammed.

There was silence on the line, I wasn't sure if Gibby had grabbed his phone and left, forgotten about the phone, or they were all standing frozen.

"Carly, I'm sorry." It was Gibby's voice. He was there, Freddie was not.

Sniffling Carly. "It's all my fault. She's my friend. I didn't want to tell her. I should've told her. We shouldn't've waited. Look at Freddie. Look at what he's become because of this! He hasn't even said her name since everything happened."

He hasn't?

"I think you and Sam will end up back to being friends again. You and Sam, you're like Sam and Ham." I hear her giggle a little through her sniffling, and I suddenly become proud of Gibby. He's so much more her type.

"You know, Carly. I wasn't very happy about it either."  
Now, he was braver than me.

"I'm sorry, Gibby. I didn't know you were going to come into the room."

"I know. But would you've stopped it?"

"Of course. I would've eventually told you…"

"After you told Sam, I'm guessing."  
Carly begins to cry hard again, and I could guess Gib wanted to take what he just said back.

"Carly. I'm really sorry. It's just that… we all deal with being hurt differently. I mean look at me. I broke up with Tasha for you-"  
"You did what?" Carly's voice interrupted him, yet it sounded so tiny, so small.

"Uh. Well. Anyways. Sam and you will work things out. I bet she's missing you too."

"Thank you. "

"Uh, well I need to pick up my PHONE now, and if you have anything else to say, SAY IT NOW." Uh oh Gibmeister, way to blow the cover.

"Well all I gotta say is that I care about you, Gibby. I appreciate what you did tonight, no matter what Freddie says."

Pfewh. That was close.

I hear some background noise, rustling with the phone, and then,

"So did you hear any of that? Or did I screw up and mute the phone again?"

"I heard."

"Good."

"Gibby, I don't know how to thank you."

"You don't have to. Like I said, we all have our ways of dealing with things that hurt us the most."

"But Freddie…"

"I know Sam. He's got a long ways to go."

"He's so mad at me."

"Yeah. He is. But he doesn't have a reason to be, Sam."

I hear a beep on the other line. Carly.

"Gibby, its Carly on the other line. I'll talk to you later, okay? I owe you."

"Good luck, Sam."

I wait a few milliseconds, and then I switch over.  
I know better than to let into Gibby's secret phone call, so I decide to play along instead.

Before she can even say hi, I begin. "Carly, I didn't tell Gibby to do anything that happened on the show, honest. I wasn't even planning on watching the whole thing anyways, I just wanted to see how much better you all were off without me."

"Sam. I'm sorry…"

"Apology accepted."

Confusion emitted from the other line.

"That's it?"

"Come on, Carls. We're like Sam and ham."

"That's what Gibby said!"

I smirk on the other line, "Oh? Did he really? Was this before or after your eyeballs popped out looking at him shirtless?"  
"Saammm!"

"Hey, I speak the truth Shay."

She laughed, and finally, I felt a little more at peace.

"So we're good?"

"We're good."

We spend the next few minutes talking about random things, yet carefully avoiding Freddie and the iCarly show's involvement.

I was glad to have my best girl friend back in my life, but I wasn't ready to tell her full detail of me moving away, or how much Freddie hurt me by how much he was acting out.

Where do things go from here?

Ahhh, chizz. I'm so glad to have accomplished that. I'm planning on finally getting to tell you what's going through Fredhead's head. Haha (: I already have the next chap mapped out, all I need is some lovely reviews to get me driven!

_ iHearYou *


	7. Fearless

**A/N: Before you guys head to my dorm with pitchforks and sticks with fire on them, I'll admit it myself that I've been really slow on updates. I never intended to get this far behind, but all of this school work is massacre-ing me. It's the week before finals, so I figured I'd sit down and write a little chapter - heavy on the angst - to show my readers that I really do care. And yes, my reviewers, you truly mean a ton to me. Every time my viewcount goes up, or I receive a review, I can't resist jumping up and down and putting a huge grin on my face. Trust me, my roommates and boyfriend question my sanity every time I do.  
Anyways, I don't own iCarly or it's characters, just the plotline of this story (: I hope you guys read & enjoy! **

**

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Chapter 7: Head First, Fearless.

Things are finally starting to get back to normal. I've been getting to spend a little time with Carly, but I've got to admit. I've been extremely guarded when it comes to certain things. I avoid the topic of Freddie completely. (Who wouldn't after what she said to Freddie on air?)

And no. She certainly does not know. I'm not just going to move in to the Shay apartment after being her friend for a day.

Last night, I walked into the infamous Shay apartment, and I looked around for Carly and found Spencer instead. Our conversation went a little like this:

"Hey Sam! Comin to move in?" I wave my arms around and motion him to be quieter.

"No. Carly's across the hall, by the way. Trying to patch things up "

"I'll give you lotsa ham!"

I pause a few seconds. "Can I take it with me?"

"Uh. No," With this statement, he sticks his tongue out immaturely, "Come on Sam. You and Carly are friends again."

"For like a few hours."

"No."

"Does Carly know that you're leaving?" There it is.

"No. And you won't tell her I am."

"I won't? When are you planning on breaking it to her?"

"Soon."

That was a huge lie. You see; I don't plan on telling Carly. Nor do I plan on telling Fredward.

You see, I'm planning to just leave _without a trace._

No one will no, except Spencer, Principal Franklin, and me.

As I enter the school building, I stop for just a second. School; it's the place I've grown to actually like over the years. Yeah, I could do without Briggs and Howard, but everyone else here is generally nice. They all adore our webshow, but don't treat us like celebrities. We're just teenagers here.

_Will that change when I move? _

As the thought flashes through my head I notice Carly walking towards me, and I shake it away.

We started talking, chit chatting, and then he comes strolling along and slides his arm around Carly's waist and kisses her on the cheek.

"Hi Carly." His voice, cold as ice as he notices my presence, yet doesn't acknowledge me.

"Freddie. Say hi." Carly's voice warns, eyebrows rose.

He feigns confusion, saying, "I already did."

You could cut the tension in the room with a knife.

"Excuse me, Freddie. My name's Sam. Once referred to as Princess Puckett by you. I believe we used to be friends? Oh, and I may have been your first kiss as well." I can't believe I just did that.

What the hell? Of course I did. I'm Sam Puckett, and I live for boldness.

In two nanoseconds, Freddie removed his suction from Carly and began walking away at a fast pace.

"I WAS TALKING TO YOU, BENSON!"

The hallway became silent, clearing a path in between he and I.

His head whipped around and that's finally when jaws started dropping.

Mine included.

"You. You _demon_," his eyes were narrowed and finger was pointing, "have NO RIGHT to talk to me. You try to ruin **EVERYTHING** I have going for me. Everything that makes me HAPPY! You try to ruin our friendship. You try to ruin iCarly. And you try and ruin my relationship. I'm going to be happy without you no matter what, DO YOU HEAR ME?"

At this point, he's standing right in front of me, screaming into my face. His hands were up, he was ready to fight if I said anything more.

I can hardly breathe.

If a few more seconds had passed, I would have lost it.

I would have had a panic attack. Bawled for the whole world to see. Lost the one thing that made me Sam Puckett: my strength.

A stray teacher pulled the both of us by our arms and escorted us into the principal's office.

Principal Ted Franklin did not seem too surprised to find me in his office.

What he wasn't expecting, however, was for Fredward Benson to be pushed in behind me.

The teacher handed Franklin a report of what happened and a list of witnesses; then after scurrying away without questions.

Franklin motions for us to sit his face scrunching up more and more with each line he read.

"What," He pauses, trying to phrase it correctly, "in the WORLD happened?"

Freddie leans back in his chair, arms crossed, as I'm sitting up straight, fighting the urge to bite my nails.

"It says here that the two of you were in a verbal dispute. Certain words here are quite… vulgar." I wince at that; Freddie stays unphased.

"Sam, did you provoke him?"

"What? Ted! I may have been in here for that reason many times, but I assure you that NONE of this is my fault." I scoff. Jeez, I'm being ballsy today. I guess being around Freddie brings the 'best' out of me.

"Ha. Yeah, right. Feed him lies." Freddie mutters, hardly audible.

"Excuse me?"

"You live to make my life HELL. I'm not putting up with it any more. Everyone can go ahead and whine about how the show's not going to be the same without you, but it'll be better."

"So that's what this is all about, huh? You're ticked that I wasn't jumping up and down, squealing and congratulating the two of you for your amazing accomplishment of keeping your relationship a secret from me?"

"**NO. **I'm pissed that you can't be happy for me ONCE in my life. You try and screw up everything good that's going on in my life. So get over it. I don't need your negativity clouding over me anymore. I love Carly. I love being the tech producer of iCarly. So i'll be fine without you being a part of my life. Actually," he pauses for a second, "I think I'll be much happier."

His smug look on his face wipes away all traces of hope in battling back I had.

Franklin doesn't know what to say or do now. He's gaping, surprised that two of his favorite students are acting like this.

"Sam. You know that I cannot punish you, your records are being transferred as we speak," I sink down a little, and out of the corner of my eye, I see Freddie cock his head a tiny bit, as if he finally realizes something's up.

"But Freddie. This is serious here. This covers grounds of verbal abuse and emotional attack."

"But she provoked me!"

Franklin sighs. He's never going to win this argument.

"Freddie, I have not witnessed this. There have been plenty of witnesses in this incident that will testify to the fact that you were screaming in Sam's face and showing signs that you were going to hit her." He shrugged. And I swear Franklin was about to have a heart attack. What happened to Ridgeway's golden boy?

"Alright Freddie… I don't fully understand what's going on between the two of you, but regardless, I have no choice but to issue detention to you for the next three days as a first incident."

Freddie throws her hands up, and throws his finger in my direction.

"What about her? What's _her_ punishment?"

Franklin shakes his head. "As far as punishment goes, Sam is the victim here."

I force a smile and stand up, "Thanks, Ted. No principal will ever top you."

Freddie and I both walk out and I get a spur of the moment case of giving it all I've got.

"Freddie." As he walks away in the opposite direction, he stops. "It's okay. Come tomorrow, you won't ever have to worry about me, ever again."

So much for leaving without a trace.

And with that, I head out of Ridgeway High's doors for what seemed to be the last time in my life.

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**- SOooo. What'd you guys think? Hate it? Love it? Wish I had written more?  
Let me know, because honestly, every review counts. It makes my heart grow!  
**** & for the next chapter, I plan on writing in Freddie point of view. It may be a bit of a struggle, but I'm planning on getting it done over Christmas break, if not earlier.**

**THANK YOU FOR READING!  
_iHearU(: **


	8. Glitter in the Air

_A/N: Hi guys! Happy early Christmas, or whatever you celebrate._

_ I loved all of your feedback, it made me glow. _

_I worked extra hard on this chapter, and i hope you guys enjoy it! It's told in Freddie's point of view, which was tough for me, cause, well... i'm a girl._

_Disclaimer: If my name was Dan Schneider, I wouldn't be writing these, would i? _

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**Chapter 8: Glitter in the Air**

"_It's okay. Come tomorrow, you won't ever have to worry about me, ever again."_

I'm sitting in the iCarly studio after school, trying to edit out glitches for some programs in webshows, and I can hardly concentrate. I keep looking up, expecting a blonde headed demon to be chucking ham towards my head.

Sam's words keep ringing in my ears. Three days ago she said that. Two days ago, she wasn't in school. I figured she was playing sick, aiming to try and make her a pity case. Yesterday, she wasn't either. I believed she was either good at acting, or she really was sick. And if it were the latter, it must be bad, or she'd be here coughing all over me. Sam can hardly stand a day at home with her mom. But two? It's kind of unheard of. Today, she didn't show up either…

Now, Carly and I are freaking out. Okay, so Carly is externally, but internally, I'm slightly concerned. It isn't like Sam to miss this much school without at least letting Carly know. After what she said, I need to know what she meant by that. I never told Carly. She was extremely pissed after what I said to Sam, yaddiyaddiyada, but she got over it when she realized that she didn't wanna lose me.

Don't get me wrong, I love Carly, but at times, she's really… shallow. A part of me felt like she just wants to date me just for the sole fact of having a boyfriend. But I'm determined to prove her wrong. I'm going to show her I'm the perfect boyfriend, and exactly what she needs.

"Freddie?" Carly asks gingerly, noticing my state of mind, "What are you thinking about?"

I shrug, and start talking about electrical outputs and AV to VGA from display ports and she rolls her eyes and interrupts me. "I'm worried about Sam. I have no clue where she is. She hasn't answered her phone except for a few texts here and there, A few one-word texts. Does she hate me again?"

"I doubt it Carly. Don't worry about her. She's probably terrorizing small children and innocent old people." I say, emphasizing my words with extra sarcasm as I wrap my arms around her.

Her shoulders tense, and she gives me 'the look'.

"Carly, quit it. Sam wants us to leave her alone. You can't just barge into everything and expect to fix it yourself. THIS IS NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS."

At that moment, Gibby walks in. "We're gonna bring Sam back? Score."

He high fives Carly, and I snarl a little under my breath.

"What's your problem? It is my business. Sam is our best friend!"  
"I'll tell you the problem, Carly. Sam WAS our best friend. She doesn't need us anymore. And I don't need her either. Things are so much better with her not getting in the way, like with our relationship. We can be open; she doesn't have to slow that down anymore. I'm sick of her insults and abuse. I'm done with her."

"Freddie, come on! You're not even thinking of anything good. You and Sam were best friends!" Gibby chimes in at that time, walking a little closer in my direction, and I push him down to the ground in reflex, and he falls over a few wires.

"Oh my gosh, Gibby! Are you okay?" Carly immediately takes charge and comes to the rescue, freaking out over a cut on his wrist from the floorboards.

"What the heck are you thinking, Freddie?"

I mumble my response, "I don't know. Sorry."

Carly stands, looks me straight in the eye.

"Sorry? Right. Listen here, Freddie. You know how you're done with Sam? Well I'm done with the way you're acting. Your insults and abuse are ten times worse than anything Sam's ever tried. Open up your eyes, Freddie. Without Sam, things are terrible. So you can be done with Sam all you want, because I'm done being in a relationship with you. I can't believe I fell for someone who's so cold hearted! When you want to be mature and be my friend again, I'll be here. But think about what you are doing right now, before you even consider being my friend ever again."

And that was how I, Fredward Benson, got dumped by **the** Carlotta Shay.

I stomped down the steps and sat on the couch, crossing my arms and huffing in disgust. Spencer comes and sits next to me.

"Spencer, I-"

"NOIWILLNOTTELLYOUWHERESAMIS!" Spencer yells out in my face, and follows up his word vomit by widening his eyes and putting both hands over my ears.

"LALALALALA. These are magical earmuffs! You did not hear that! I know nothing!"

I look at him and pull his hands off of my ears, calmly.

"You know where she is?" I say, surprised.

"Oh! Look! It's a… uh…" Spencer's eyes dart around the room, desperate to diverge my attention. "It's an adolescent boy?"

"Give up, and tell me."

"Her dad's house." Spencer stands and begins to sprint into the bathroom, and I hear the water start to run. "I'M WASHING AWAY THE FACT I EVER TOLD YOU THAT!"

Her dad's house? Sam never, ever talks about her dad. I've never heard her or Carly bring it up – I always believed it was one of those unspoken rules that we establish between us. I don't speak about my dad, Carly doesn't speak about her mom, Sam doesn't speak about her dad. But now, I can't stop thinking about –

Wait. Why should I even care? This is SAM PUCKETT we're talking about. I refuse to tell Carly about this because she's going to get some grand scheme in her head about going to Sam's dad's house to beg her to come back and love us and blah blah blah.

Not gonna happen.

I was just never going to mention it to my ex girlfriend and just get along with my life. What's the worst that could happen?

_SP__-FB-SP_FB-SP__ SP__-FB-SP_FB-SP__ SP__-FB-SP_FB-SP__ SP__-FB-SP_FB-SP_

I'm sitting on the fire escape later on that evening, feeling pretty betrayed. Sam's gone. Carly's not my girlfriend. Gibby is hitting on Carly. **Sam's gone.**

My mom was out on another late shift at the hospital, probably bored with the lack of patients with injuries caused by Sam.

_Where's her dad's house anyways? _No, Freddie! Stop that. Sam's probably found a new nub to pick on.

_Is that where Melanie lives too? _Ugh, Benson. Quit it. You're starting to sound like a chick.

I slump back into the chair as I look into the Seattle sky, and my headphones begin playing a song I memorized every word to. As if in reflex, my head swivels to the fire escape's window, half expecting to see blonde.

_That's where this song's from._ The night Sam and I had our first kiss.

I unplug my headphones from the device and wind up my hand, ready to throw my PearPod as far as I could.

Damn it, Sam, why do you get under my skin so bad?

I take a few deep breaths, and relax.

Sam will come back. She's probably just vacationing there, or taking some time to cool off.

_You want her to come back._

No. I want things to get better. I want her to come back so I can date Carly again, and I want her to be nicer. Hopefully it's a reality check for her, that she can't have things her way.

_And neither can you, Freddie. What's gotten better since she left?_

I close my eyes and lean back, deep in thought.

We introduced Gibby to the show… Who made Carly fall for him and made all the viewers want Sam back more.

I finally stood up for myself to Sam… and it got me three night's detention, a nanny cam set up by my mom, and a mark on my permanent record regarding verbal assault.

Carly and I got to be open with dating each other... and it ended in scaring her away because she doesn't think I care about Sam.

_Do i? _

I think back to what Carly said the night Sam flipped out on us. Carly claimed Sam to be jealous, and that was the whole reason she never wanted to tell Sam in the first place. I never really believed Carly about her being jealous – I only attributed her anger to her not being included into knowing that her best friends – best friend and enemy? – Are dating.

_But are you missing something?_

The day after the dance.

_Carly and mine's lovely dates, Austin and Malika, decided to be freaks, and I ended up enjoying a dance with Carly at the Groovy Smoothie. It was probably the highlight of my night, but things were kind of awkward after. I kind of just sat there and toyed around with my phone, wondering, "where's Sam?" _

_The next day, we went into the school, and Sam was kind of looking at us funny. "What's up?"_

"_Where were you last night?" I ask it before Carly gets a chance. _

"_You know, around." _

"_Sam, you weren't at the dance. You weren't at the Groovy Smoothie."_

_She turns into her locker, and I hear her mumble, "yes I was."_

"_Wha-""I need to get to class early to discuss my grades, guys. See you soon." Carly interrupts my questioning, leaving she and I standing there._

"_You were there last night?"_

_Something flashes in her eyes, unexpecting confrontation of this question, and she answers, "What's it to you, Benson? I went to Gibby's house. Ended up, I got turned down by Gibby. He has a girl. Went to the GS. Walked in and saw you and Carls all lovey-dovey, left. The end, happily ever after." _

"_You saw us? Why didn't you come sit and hang out?"  
"Because. Wow, Fredwina, I never knew you were this dumb." And she pushed me down and walked away to class. _

Was she trying to tell me something? Or did she just mean that she didn't want to ruin Carly and mine's moment?

Either way, I begin to feel more and more guilty for everything going on.

I know I need to get to the bottom of what's going on and why Sam's at her dad's house, so I snuck away from my mother's supervision and walked to Sam's mom's house.

"Whaddya want?" Moments after I knock on the Puckett's door, Pam Puckett stands in the doorway, whiskey bottle in hand, staring me down.

"Hi, uh, Miss Puckett. I was wondering if you could tell me about where Sam-"  
"Sam? You mean that wretched girl who used to live here?"

My eyes widened, a lot. "I mean your daughter, ma'm."

She shrugs, and looks over her shoulder, "Meh. No daughters here. Melanie's away at school, and the other one…" She puts her finger to her temple and starts tapping it, as if she's having trouble remembering.

"Sam?"

"Oh yeah. That one; kicked her out."

My stomach dropped a little. Kicked her daughter out?  
"When?"

"You know. After the coppers took her in. I don't need that in my house." She looks over her shoulder and stumbles a little more. I notice some guy in a wife beater lying out in a wife beater, drinking what looked to be his sixth or seventh beer.

Of course she would think her daughter's the problem.

"Can you give me her father's address?" It kind of tumbled out of my mouth before I could help myself.

"What do I look like, kid? I don't give handouts to people I don't know."

She starts to pull the door shut, and I give it my last shot.

"Please, Miss Puckett. That's the only thing I'm here for and then I'll leave you alone."

I thought she was about to slam the door, but instead grabs a piece of paper and pen, scribbling something down.

"There. Happy? Now go leave me alone so mama can have some fun."

That statement gave me shivers up my spine. Sam.

I take the piece of paper and carefully fold it and place it in my pocket.

After rushing home when it was nearly dark, I come into the apartment to be greeted by my mom, screeching, "Freddie! I was worried sick! You know better than to be out without telling mommy! What in the world were you-" And I cut her off, nearly shocking her by wrapping her up in a big hug.

Sometimes you don't realize how good you have it, til slipping into someone else's shoes.

* * *

_A/N:_

_Ah, so now you see where the plot thickens. Finally, Freddie shows his emotions! And Carly and Freddie are done dating. Or are they? _

_Let me know what you think? _

_iHearU _


	9. The Crow & The Butterfly

**A/N: Welcome back! I hope to see that you enjoy this upcoming chapter, but first, let me thank my loyal and lovely reviewers: **Jenna-mckenzieloveseddie, Marshmello, KWilson , PewPew, x33Sarahx , Take this and kick it , Just Another Random Reader , MandarinWafflesOfSaltyness , Seddielovergrl , ccQTccQT , SuperSumer , Axedl , mebelucy , Flutter360 , Lanter , Lauren, hCcGlee , n3rdf1ght3r , OverTheRainbow91 , seddielover595 , I should make an account but, g, KarlaRockAngel, CryingxInside , Virgoleo23, scoobygang101 , personmcpeople , & a5h13y 101. **You all have given me amazing inspiration, and if I could, I'd thank you personally. **

**In this chapter, I switched back to Sam's point of view. In the time range, I was originally going to try and fit three days (the three days that Carly and Freddie had been wondering where Sam was since she wasn't showing up at Ridgeway High) of Sam's new life into this. But, I can only fit two, so maybe next chapter, I'll mosh Freddie and Sam together.**

**I have added 3 characters of my own. Normally, when a writer's own characters are added, readers lose interest. I promise that they won't have too large of a part aside from this chapter.**

**Thank you for taking the time out of your days to read this, it's my longest chapter I've ever written in my entire life!**

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**Chapter Nine: The Crow & The Butterfly **

I never imagined anything like this to ever happen. I'm sitting in a guest room in some giant mansion that belongs to my _father _and his wife, whom I've been told to call my _stepmom_. Never.

From the moment I had the Seattle Cab drive me from the Holiday Inn to the Airport, I immediately felt sick to my stomach. I was leaving my hometown. The only people who I ever've known. My best friend, my worst enemy, my big brother, my deadbeat mother, Mrs. Crazy Benson, Gibby, Lewbert, Ted, T-bo...

Who was there? I didn't know anyone there. I hardly even remember what my father even looked like. How could I share a house with him? I'm considering asking him to pull Mel from prep school so I could have her by my side.

When I was in the airport, checking my bags and looking up boarding times, I ended up puking in the restrooms. I was so uneasy of the whole situation, so scared that I was shaking. Nausea increased as I attempted to grab some food before the flight, and ended up throwing up instead.

The small plane I was seated in freaked me out. It was tiny and made me feel claustrophobic, and there was no Carly here to calm me down, and no Freddie to squeeze the hell out of his hand during take off and landing. As we sat before departure, I checked my phone one last time, skimming through the texts from Carly, asking "where are you!" I just told her I was okay, and alive. That's all she needs to know anyways.

A stewardess noticed my white knuckles and asked if I wanted headphones to watch the in-flight movie. I paid her a few bucks and kept them around my neck, waiting for the screen to pop up and start. A little blonde head popped into the seat next to me, her parents getting her settled before sitting two rows ahead. She was a small girl, around the age of five or six with fairly curly hair, and she turned and grinned widely at me. **(A/N: hello, iSpace Out) **

"Whatcha want, kid?" I grumbled, raising my eyebrow at her.

She shook her head and tugged at my purple bracelet, the one I stole from Freddie a couple months ago.

"You're kidding me, right? It's mine." Yanking back my wrist, I stuck my tongue out at her and she stuck hers out right back at me. Geez, kid's got spunk.

I fished through my carry on bag and tried to think of something to give her instead. I'm pretty sure she wouldn't want a fat cake. Stickers? Kids like stickers. Carly gave me some sniff and scratch stickers of fruit, and they were in here somewhere.

I pulled them out, and handed them to her. Her head tilted a little in confusion, and then she pulled at my arm again. "What now?"

Her face scrunched up, and then her eyes lit up as if she figured it out.

-Poke-

Sticker on my arm. Grapes.

Hmm. I'm pretty amused now.

"They go with your bracelet!" She squealed. I realized then that this wasn't gonna be too bad of a flight.

SPFBSPFBSPFBSPFB

As the plane landed, the little girl next to me, Kylie Bennette, and I were covered with stickers all over our arms, shirts and faces. I've gotta remember to thank Carly again for those.

Her parents were kind of surprised to see us laughing and covered in stickers, but her mom spoke up, saying, "I'm so thankful that Kylie made a friend. She hates flying with a passion; we were preparing for a scream fest the whole time. Thank you so much for keeping her entertained."

I told her it was no prob, her kid was pretty awesomesauce. As I was getting my stuff from the overhead compartment, I hear Kylie yell, "Bye Sammy! Good luck with Freddie!"

What?

I never told the girl anything about Freddie, let alone mentioned his name in the whole flight.

I turned around to ask her where she even came up with it; she was running off the plane.

Weird.

My head kept replaying the flight, wondering when I mentioned Freddie or if I had fallen asleep or said anything to her regarding him, and I honestly couldn't think of any instance.

Baggage Claim was a zoo, and I picked up my bags and looked around for my dad, or someone who resembled what I remembered.

No dice.

When I was about to give up and call my dad's cell, I notice a guy holding a sign, "Samantha Puckett".

My dad had enough money to blow on a chauffer? Huh. This was new.

I walked up to him and raised an eyebrow at him. Sure didn't look like a chauffer; he was dressed in jeans and a t-shirt with light brown hair and looked to be a teenager. Gotta admit, he was pretty cute.

"Who are you?" I ask from next to him, startling him.

"Damn, you do look just like Melanie. Come on, let's go."

He starts walking, expecting me to just follow him without taking any of my things. He stops when he realizes that I'm not following him.

"Are you deaf?" He sees my eyes narrow, and rolls his eyes in retaliation, backtracking and forcefully grabbing two bags and a roll-on suitcase. I follow him with the rest of my stuff, grumbling. Who was this kid anyways?

I follow him all the way to a parking deck, and we stop at an escalade.

"Okay, pretty boy. I'm not getting in this car 'til you tell me why you're here and not my dad, and who you are."

"First off, I'm older than you. So don't treat me like I'm five. I'm eighteen. Second off, your dad's at work. Mom didn't want to freak you out too much by coming to get you, and they sent me because your dad says you're a lot like me."

"So who are you?"

"Colin Everett Owens. Your step brother."

Lovely. I eye him over. Must've been her kid with another guy before daddy dearest came along.

"Fine." I snap.

"No nice to meet you?"

"You're not anyone I'm happy to meet. " I snarl at him.

He laughs a little, as if I've told him some great joke. "Your dad told me you were the opposite of Melanie, but I didn't expect this." He runs his hand through his hair, kind of like Freddie often does. Agh.

"Come on. Lets go." The fancy car unlocks, and I slide into the passenger's seat grudgingly.

"So, Samantha, tell me bout yourself."

"Don't call me Samantha. My name is Sam. Nothing to tell. Don't worry, Colin, I'm not here to join your big happy family."

"Right. Big happy family. Sure. At least Melanie treats me nice."

"Will you quit it with the Melanie comments already? We all know I'm not Melanie. I don't own anything pink. I don't like lace or bows. And I don't just accept being abandoned by my father at the age of six, especially when he tears my twin sister away from me."

That shut him up quick.

I turn the radio on to some rock music and we stay silent for the rest of the ride.

We pull into a driveway, with a gate at the end, and then I see it.

Colin must've noticed my gawking, because he says, "So, welcome to the Puckett estate."

This gigantic house belongs to my dad? The same man who hardly sends minimum for child support? Mel always said he was well off, but I never thought _this _well off.

I sit there, soaking it all in while Colin takes out all my bags. I close my eyes tight and take a deep breath, before opening them and the door.

"Okay, lets get everything inside, the guest bedroom's set up for you. Mom should be in there someplace."

I tagged along into the house and ogled. Everything was so large and clean. It made mom and mine's home look like a rabbit hole.

Before Colin could stop me, I dropped my things by the front door and headed up the steps, taking them two by two. Main bedroom, the lovely couples. Side bedroom, door closed. Colin's bedroom. Melanie's bedroom. I travelled down the opposite end of the hall, and found a guest room; my name glittered on the door. I was expecting it to be like Melanie's, frou-frouy and decked out in pepto pink, but was extremely surprised to see this room of whites and reds. Everything had a place, and I had no clue what I was doing in here.

"Where do you want your stuff, Princess Puckett?" Colin asked, red faced from carrying everything.

"Don't call me that either!" I sniped, and he set the stuff down, putting his hands out in defense. Freddie calls me that. Only Freddie.

"Fine. Be like that. For your information, I never asked for you to come here, so quit tweaking."

He exits the room, finally leaving me with some peace and quiet.

I take off my boots, and spread out on the comforter. It felt like I was lying on a cloud. If I could stay in this room for the rest of my life here, I would. Then again, I might just try.

-Knock-

I jump up and there's a lady standing at my door, curiously looking in. She was tall – not as tall as my mom – but had long layered brown hair with bright green eyes. She was wearing a slender black dress, looking like a typical housewife.

"Samantha! It's nice to finally meet you." She comes into my room and leans in for a hug. I look at her like she's some kind of alien.

Awkward.

"Well. Welcome. I'm Cindy, you can call me your stepmom; Melanie does. I hope you like your temporary room. We're going to have the decorators come in and properly adjust it to your tastes. I was hoping for more warning so I could tailor it to look a bit like Melanie's, but we can work with it soon."

I nod. I don't want to be impolite and yell at her to realize the obvious – I'm not Melanie.

"So, Samantha," (I cringe) "Tell me, how do you like California? Aren't the palm trees beautiful?"

"Sure." I can't be as emphatic as her, and my short statement comes out in a monotone.

She seems slightly offended, but continues on anyways, "Well. Dinner should be in an hour. You should probably wash up and change." She gets up to leave.

"Change?"

"Yes, of course. Oh, don't worry. Melanie was kind enough to lend you a few of her clothes, including dinner dresses. They're in your closet. Hopefully, we'll get to the mall this week to buy you some proper clothes." She eyes my wardrobe, pointedly.

"Right."

"Alright, well. I gave the nanny and housekeeper the night off; her name's Ellie if you run into her this week. Your father suggested we order in tonight to celebrate your arrival. He should be home within the next twenty minutes."

She leaves the room and I follow her seconds later to look out into the hallway. I see Colin walking by.

"Is she plastic?" I ask him. Cindy looked like a Barbie doll.

"Of course not. That's just her money supply." He enters the side room from the master bedroom and comes out with a sandy haired boy. Great. More screwed up family.

"Nash, say hello to Sam."

"Melanie! I miss-sed you!" The boy wraps his arms around my legs.

"Nash? What kind of name is that?"

The little boy looks up at me, not understanding. Blonde hair, green eyes. Perfect mix of the two.

"Sam, he's six. Cut him some slack."

I bend down, and look him in the eyes. "I'm not Melanie, got it? My name's Sam. And I'm not your sister, so cut the crap."

His eyes go wide, as if it sunk in a little bit. He ran and hid behind Colin's legs, scared.

"Colin, she swore! She's mean!"

"Crap's not a swear word. But if you really want I could teach you some."

"Oookay, lets get ready for dinner, Nashy." The big brother interrupts.

Colin shoots me the evil eye, looking extremely exasperated. Oh well, not my problem.

I actually comply with Cindy's wishes and pull on a purple dress, just for tonight. If this was a daily thing, there was no way I would put up with it.

From my window, I see a Lexus pull into the drive, and I knew exactly who was in it.

I paced in the bedroom, trying to muster enough confidence to go downstairs. Colin pokes his head into the room, likely to tell me that my father is home, but stops when he notices my actions.

"Hey, are you okay?" His tone dramatically changes from earlier.

I shake my head, trying to tell him to go away, but he just enters the room further.

"Stop pacing. You're shaking, Sam. What's wrong?"

I take a few deep breaths before answering, "I haven't seen him in ten years."

It takes a few seconds for him to get it. "Oh. I see. How about I go downstairs and stall? Come down when you're ready."

I then realize that this kid isn't so bad.

I sit on the edge of the bed and try to concentrate really hard on what it was like, what life was like before my dad left. I remember the smell of his aftershave, I remember his constant anger at my mom, I remember when he would take Melanie and I out for ice cream, calling us the three Pucketteers.

But I can't help but remember the night he left us how I couldn't sleep and pretended not to hear my mom and Melanie cry, how my mom drank herself through the week and how I learned to grow up and fend for myself at the age of six. I remember the jealousy I felt when Melanie was chosen to come to his home instead of me. I remember the anguish I felt from being alone in the suddenly huge room that was meant for Melanie and I to share. I remember my mom bringing home different guys every night and me thinking, "that's not my daddy."

Why did he have to leave me all alone with her?

I decided to put on my brave face and weather the storm.

Taking the same swirly staircase back downstairs, I could hear them in the dining room, and I could hear him.

I was still shaking before I could enter the room. Game face, on.

"Hey."

My dad turned around in his chair and stood up quickly to face me.

"Samantha."

His smile grew large, and I just looked down at the floor.

He was dressed in a white dress shirt with a powder blue tie. His hair was combed perfectly, his face fully shaven. Those blue eyes, the eyes I inherited, haunt me.

"Come! Come sit! We ordered Chinese food in your honor. I remember when you were a kid and used to eat pounds of this stuff." His deep voice brought me back. No, dad. That wasn't me that ate all of the Chinese food. That was Melanie.

I didn't want to correct him. I didn't even shake my head.

I just sat down next to Nash and put some lo mein and sesame chicken on my plate and ate it politely.

Nash and Colin were cutting their food into itty bite size pieces before taking small bites. I couldn't help but cringe. Napkins set in their laps, elbows off the table.

Cindy was staring at me, expecting me to say something, but what?

"So, Samantha, how was your flight in?" He said, attempting to spark conversation.

"Um. It was okay."

"She looked exactly like Melanie when I found her at baggage claim." Colin attempts to save me.

"Colin. You know not to interrupt the conversation between your stepfather and Samantha. That was very disrespectful. Please apologize." Cindy scolds him, as if he was five years old.

"No, its okay. Its true, I look identical to her. When Melanie came to visit back home…" I trail off, thinking of Freddie's reaction.

No one was really listening to me anyways, which was pretty annoying. Colin's cheeks were red, Nash was trying to use his butter knife in the right manner, Cindy was shooting daggers through her eyes in his direction, and my father was rubbing his temples as if this was the most stressful thing in his life.

I sat back and let the Chinese food sink down my stomach, making me feel queasy after being the only food since throwing up earlier.

"Uh. May I be excused?" I ask, hopefully.

"Samantha, we have not even served desert yet. You must wait." Cindy insisted. I almost said, "Yeah, right. You're not my mother." But for the bajillionth time that night, I bit my tongue.

I sat as Cindy brought out a cake of some sorts, white with raspberry filling. I took about three bites.

"Samantha, its impolite to waste food." There she goes again. I was starting to feel like Mrs. Benson was a better woman than her.

"Sorry, Cindy, but I'm not hungry." She twitched when I said her name. I was, really. But my stomach just wouldn't agree with me.

"Well. Nash. How was school today?"

"It was well. We're working on subtraction with large numbers, which was pretty easy with all of the help Ellie provided me."

Was this kid a twenty year old in a six year old body? He sounded like a total snob to me.

My stomach was starting to lurch.

I got up and sprinted up the steps, with Cindy behind me, yelling, "Samantha! You weren't permitted to be excused!"

My stomach emptied in the bathroom, which was luckily connected to my new room.

I hear Cindy and my dad talking as they walk up the steps.

"She had better not stain the porcelain." The wretched woman just will not give up.

"Sammy? Are you okay?" My dad knocked at my bathroom door as more bile came up.

"Ugh. Maybe I should call Ellie to come back and take care of _her_."

"Nonsense. She'll be fine."

"I'm fine. The plane ride didn't sit well with the Chinese food."

He shrugs and leads Cindy away.

"If you need anything, tell Colin."

I was feeling better, yet I was extremely aggravated with my father and Cindy's passive behavior towards me. And telling Colin? What good would that do?

I cut the lights and climb into bed. I need to get over the jet lag.

Lying there, I was too comfortable to sleep.

"Do you need anything? Ginger ale and crackers? A cold cloth for your forehead? Are you running a temperature?" Colin stood in my doorway, aiming to help.

"I'm fine. I just have a little jet lag, I guess."

"Alright, I'll let you sleep…" He's about to walk out.

"I can't sleep. Colin? Why are you being so nice to me?"

"I know things are hard for you. My mom's kind of an ice queen, so she doesn't really help. Plus. You look a hell of a lot like Melanie. You haven't talked to her recently have you? I'm surprised she never mentioned me or Nash."

"I try not to. My mom kind of has this unspoken rule about her not talking about the life she has with you guys."

I see his smile fall a little. What was it with this kid and Melanie?

"Melanie talked a lot about you and your mom… Besides the obvious, do you miss life there?" Wow, Mel must've filled him in a lot more than I expected.

I let my shoulders sag a little.

"My best friend and I were just starting to piece things back together after a big fight. My other best friend… my enemy… my frenemy? He hates me. I miss Spencer and Gibby and Guppy. I even miss my school a little." I feel a little worn when I mention these things. "Do you guys watch iCarly?"

He gives me a sincere smile. "My mom monitors Nash and mine's online time. We're only allowed to use the Internet for research. She's afraid Nash'll get addicted to online video games, and that I'll be addicted to porn." He says it with a straight face, which only makes me laugh a little more. "But everyone in school definitely talks about it from time to time. Your charisma with Freddie seems to take everyone's interest." Of course they would.

"Have you ever liked someone you couldn't have?"

He looks at me and starts laughing, hard.

I don't get it.

"It's okay. Sorry I'm confusing you. It's just… you have no idea. Get some sleep, Sam. School starts tomorrow; be up around six am."

With that, he exits the room.

My mind starts reeling. Freddie keeps haunting me everywhere I turn, but I doubt he even cares I'm gone. I bet he loves living life pain free.

And what's the deal with Colin anyways?

With all of my disturbing thoughts and unanswered questions, I drift off to sleep.

FBSPFBSPFBSPFBSPFBSPFBSPFBSP

Six am comes too early.

I'm dragging my butt out of the comfortable bed and get into the shower, grabbing clothes that were haphazardly laid out for me sometime during the night by step monster dearest.

Pink. Great. A pink sweater, and grey jeans. I was about to tackle my clothes pile for something of my own to wear, but someone had already taken it to the laundry room.

I worked through my tangled mess of hair forcefully and blowdried it as straight as could be. I pushed in a black headband to aim to salvage dignity my hair made me lose.

I walked down to the kitchen and noticed a little woman cooking.

"Ah! Samantha! Sit, sit, breakfast is served." I noticed Colin, ready with his polo and khakis, with Nash wearing nearly identical attire.

"You're wearing _those _boots?" Cruella de Ville snapped at me. Her hair was in curlers and she was waltzing to the table clad in a bathrobe. Gross.

A plate of waffles appeared in my setting, and I almost picked them up with my hands and ate them like that, just to spite her. "What's wrong with them? They're leather. So what?"

"They're inappropriate for school."

I rolled my eyes. She looked as if I just swore every word in the books.

"When your father finally realizes that your attitude is disrespectful towards me, you best believe things will change. I will not stand for it in my house."

"Kay. Colin, can we go now?"

"Sure. Mother, may we be excused?" Colin still plays the polite game. I feel like he's brainwashed.

"Fine. Go."

With that, we head to drop Nash off at Elementary school, and then get to the high school, where everything's new to me…

I head to the office first; to tell them I'm a new student and pick up a schedule and signed late passes.

I get to my new locker on the second floor and it takes four tries to get the combination right. I sputter out obscurities, and people are staring. A group of people come up to me, asking about iCarly.

Which then prompts more.

And more.

And more.

All day long, kids were approaching me, asking the stupidest questions about iCarly, especially ones dealing with Freddie and I. I was fed up with it.

By the time sixth period came around, I took off towards the doors.

But no.

They lock their students in here. Prison? I think yes.

All of my time spent in my classes was either being talked about behind my back or being asked forward questions.

No one is afraid of me here.

At the end of my school day, Colin came around to find me.

"Geez, you'd think you were another celebrity." He jokes, guiding me to the entrance, finally unlocked after final bell.

"I hate this. I want to go back to Ridgeway." I never thought I'd say that in a million years, but here I was.

He puts his arm around me in a brotherly manner, "Sis, you'd better get used to it."

I climb into his escalade, and he doesn't protest again when I change the radio station to country.

After entering the house, I throw off my boots and plop myself down on the couch in what I believed were their living room, taking the remote from the side table and changing the channel from the already on TV. Infomercials, yuck.

I begin flipping through channels, until Cindy comes in and begins to throw a fit. "Excuse me? Who said you could change the channel? I didn't hear you ask. And even if you did ask, I didn't respond. Change it back."

"You weren't watching it." I mumble.

"TV isn't meant for children. This is my television, and when you're older, maybe you may watch. But in my home, what I say goes."

She snatches the remote back out of my hand and changes it back to the infomercials.

Okay. She's way worse than Mrs. Benson.

I want to go home.

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**A/N: So? What'd you think? I promise to have some Seddie interaction within the next chapter, this was just all the little stuff needed to add up to the next chapter. And before I get reviews asking about Colin and Sam, no. He doesn't have a crush on her. But he does have a crush on someone! I bet you can figure it out if you look really closely. If not, you'll likely figure it out within the next chapter or two. **

**Most of all, I couldn't have gotten this far without your support! You guys are my inspiration, and I appreciate you for all of its worth. **


	10. A Mess It Grows

**A/N: Eeeek! I'm baaack. **

**First and Foremost: Thank you to my amazing reviewers: SuperSumer, sedddddiebaby, Loulock, CandyHardyCenaHale, ccQTccQT, ForeverDanni, 21, n3rdf1ght3r,  
Take this and kick it, Just Another Random Reader, sseddieninjaa, and g. You and all of the non-reviewing viewers make me so happy. I've never ever gotten over 50 reviews in my life. I've never even MADE it to fifty. And for the last chapter, it was the most reviews I got from the whole story so far. I appreciate you guys so much, and I thank you for following the story with such a great eye. **

**To answer the Melanie/Colin feedback, wellll, I guess you'll have to read this to see? I don't think I can manage a Melanie P.O.V. in this story, but i've worked out her part a bit in the middle of the story. (See more in my post-chapter comments about this) **

**This chapter includes a heavy amount of dialogue from Sam, and a bit of it is repeated from Sam's original struggle, but more detailed and explanatory in Sam's perspective. **

**Disclaimer: If I owned the rights to iCarly, I wouldn't have a three month hiatus and probably make a movie special of this story. So yeah, DanWarp & Nickelodeon, what now?**

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Chapter 10: A Mess It Grows

I, Sam Puckett, am sitting alone at lunch. Yes, alone at a table. Like mean girls, only no one here hates me. They just avoid me and talk about me around me. I'm waiting for someone, anyone to finally speak in my direction so I can slam him or her to the ground with my fist or something.

Take my lit class today. He's some middle-aged guy who spent his time lecturing us about the pros and cons of works getting published. He named off a bunch of famous poets and authors, and then looked straight at me when he said, "well, we all can't get by being mildly famous from, hmm, you know, things like web shows and what not." My jaw dropped. Apparently he wasn't a fan of iCarly.

I went to stop by the principal's office, cause ya know that that Ted was always there to chitchat with. The office ladies were all, "The principal's office is for students being punished. Otherwise, he has better things to do than to sit around talking to students who just want to get out of class." Ugh.

School is pointless. I do my work like a good little girl and go home and do my homework as well. Then stepmonster decides that I don't have any extra curricular activities, so I can become Nash's babysitter and let Ellie take a 'break' (she still cooks and cleans the house). Nash hates me for it. He says Melanie explained stuff easier, like with math she used candies and with books she made puppets. Newsflash, kid, they don't dumb things down in the real world.

So now, I'm stuck. I'm miserable here. Colin's the only one who I talk to; I'm stuck here alone.

"Are you dating Colin?" Some girl with bleach blonde hair comes up behind me, biting her nails before and after the question.

"No. He's like my stepbrother. Not my boyfriend."

"Cool, so you don't care if I go after him?"

I look over this chick once again. Bleach blonde, fake tan, mini skirt and pink tight top.  
"I care. He doesn't want some uptight prick like you around." I say, before I can stop myself

She looks surprised; she's the first girl to get through a conversation with me at this place.

"Trust me. You're not his type." And in that stereotypical moment, she scoffs, flips her hair back off her shoulder, and walks away.

I roll my eyes reflexively. I want to go back to Seattle.

"I thought she's never leave." Colin peaks out from behind the corner and stands next to me, "Thank you so much for getting rid of her."

"Who is she?" I ask, as we walk out to his car.

"Kara Meijer. She's been after me since she's known I'm single. She won't let up." Weird. I don't understand.

"Okay, she's airheaded and I get that she doesn't seem like your type and all, but I keep getting the same vibes from every girl in this school. What gives?" I had to be forward to get some answers.

"Listen. You're just being preyed upon cause you're the new girl in school and I've been single for a loonngg time. The girls here think that I'm their territory. Which I'm not."

I frown, still confused. I don't get why he's single. He is pretty cute, and he has good tendencies. He's not a total tool, and I think he deserves to be happy.

Later on, after Colin drops me off at the house, I'm chilling with Nash, supervising his 'non-curricular activities' (aka, the kid playing with his hot wheels. Tidily.) When I hear the downstairs kitchen door open and close.

"That's probably Colin. He sometimes comes home to get food after football or hockey practice before he goes to the library for his study group." Jeez. This mom has these kids on a leash.

I walk downstairs, thinking that a snack might be a good idea as well, when I hear him talking on the phone.

"Yeah, she's doing okay I guess. She doesn't really talk to many people at school. Mhm, I dunno. Mom usually makes her babysit Nash when she gets done with school. I know. Mom isn't too friendly with her." Pause. "Yeah, I guess not."

My curiosity fills me as I enter the room, and he looks at me, kind of alarmed. "Hey, Mellie, gotta go, bye!" Rushing off the phone with Mellie. Mel? Melanie?

"You were talking to my sister?"

"Uhm, yeah." He gets things out of the fridge, and starts building a sandwich, face red.

"Since when do you talk to Melanie?"

He looks at me crazy. "She and I grew up together, duh."

He sees me wince and immediately he realizes he made a mistake.

"Sam, I'm sorry…" He sounds regretful, like he shouldn't've made that mistake.

I shrug, pretending it didn't hurt.

"Sam." He says, trying to soften me up. I'm clenching my fists, telling myself to take deep breaths.

"What did Mel tell you? About why I'm here?" I was literally letting my guard down.

"She just said you had some issues back at your mom's house." That's it?

"Oh. Well here's the truth. My father left when I was in kindergarten. I was six, and vulnerable. I didn't understand why he was leaving, and he sat down and explained to Mel and I that he loved us, but he loved some other lady more than my mom. I never met your mother. I had no clue that this was going on, but what six-year-old kid would?" I said, recounting my feelings of confusion, when Mel and I sat in our room listening to my dad and mom screaming to each other downstairs over a certain word. "A fair?" I remember Mel asking, "Why would they be not married because of a fair?"

Colin sits across from me, nodding. "I get it. I was eight when your dad showed up."

"Yep. So my dad left. And it was okay, I was holding on strong while Mel cried herself to sleep. I got angry about it. I would sit in class during parent show and tell days, bitter. I let Melanie have my mom, my personal choice. She needed her support. So when there was no parent standing behind me, reading my paper or praising my artwork, I let it all eat me up inside." I sigh at this, and take a drink of water.

"I caught my sister talking to him on the phone a bunch of times. "Daddy," she'd say, sobbing into the receiver, "when are you coming home? I miss you!" I knew he wasn't coming back. I just hated the reality of it all." I shift my eyes away from Colin's; I didn't want him seeing the vulnerable side of me. "When my mom pulled her aside a week from our seventh birthday, a part of me wasn't surprised when Melanie came bursting into my room, excited that she was going to see our father for her birthday. Perfect birthday wishes come true. I knew it was a dream come true… because it was mine too. I put up a tough façade, being happy for her.

"My birthday and her birthday were two very different occasions. On my birthday, my mom refused to take me out or give me presents. I didn't understand, I asked and asked for something, anything. My mom kept telling me no. If Melanie wasn't here to celebrate with me, I wasn't allowed to celebrate without her. She came home the week after, and literally brought a truckload of gifts with her. As a seven year old, I couldn't help but be jealous. I never got a gift from my mom that year. And as a matter of fact, I think only Melanie did."

"Easter came and she got so excited. She ran around like a banshee, jumping on her bed, so excited to go back to you guys. No ticket for me, of course. My heart was sunk. I didn't understand. So in the middle of her gloating, I yelled something at her of how he didn't care about us, and how if she loved it so much she should just go there and stay there. When what I really felt was that he didn't care about me, and she should take me with her. But what I said… it must've made some impact on her. Because around six or seven days later, I was left with an empty room and no goodbye from her because she never even came home." I was holding back tears by this point, trying to keep strong to my story.

"And then I was mad. I was so angry that people didn't want to be in my life so I took it out in other ways. I'd get into fights with boys who asked me about Melanie. I'd be in and out of the principal's office on a daily basis. My mom, she just… she didn't care. She would pretty much let me fend for myself. She would call me Melanie all the time, and eventually just called me "kid" when she wasn't too drunk to function. I've kind of known in my heart that she cared about Mel a ton more than me, but I've always shrugged it off. In late elementary school years, she started bringing guys home. A different guy a different week. She disowned me half the time, because she didn't want guys to know that she had a kid. And she was always out, working or at the bar picking up guys. So there was never any food in the house and I'd sometimes go to sleep without anything but a school lunch. I've learned to appreciate school lunches time after this.

"I met my best friend around this time, and her friend. We all became close, hence iCarly. But recently, my best friend and my other friend started dating behind my back. Which was a pretty big deal to me, because they were keeping a big secret from me when we all promised we wouldn't. I got upset and kind of ran away. The police found me, and I was taken into the station, to get picked up by my mom… and she never came. I had to go back to Carly's house with Spencer, because he was the only one willing enough to come pick me up. The next day I went back to my house and my mother told me that she didn't want me anymore. Then I spent the night at a different friends house, a hotel for a week, and now I'm here."

Colin looks at me, sympathy etched on his face. "I'm really sorry. Come give me a hug." So I hug him, and yeah. I'll admit it. I even let a few tears fall onto his shoulder.

"My mom, she's pretty controlling. I want you to watch out for her. Nash and I obey her every whim because it's just easier than her anger. She's your dad's queen, and the world revolves around her. As much as I can't stand it, she's my mom." I nod my head. I understand exactly what he means; I wouldn't have lived at home if I didn't still love my mom. Even if she does love Melanie more than me.

Colin looks at his phone, and grimaces. "I gotta go, okay? I'll be back in a half hour, tops." He says goodbye and exits. I go back upstairs and check on Nash, who's delighted that he's finally allowed to smash his cars up, and then decide to do a little investigation. Melanie's room.

When I enter this bubble gum pink room, I swear it hurts my eyes. I look around the room, seeing her ballerina trophies and pictures of her friends from prep school and have the strong urge to gag. I knew exactly what I was looking for. Typical girl. Top drawer of her nightstand, easy to pick lock.

Melanie's diary.

I knew she kept two, so she wouldn't have to carry both around and it get lost in transit from school and home. So I began flipping through pages. Melanie has to have some sort of secrets, I knew it. So I look, starting from the older entries on. I see Cindy's name pop up, Nash's. Dad giving her purses and buying her shoes. But I keep flipping pages, a little further in.

Aha.

Found Something.

_'Today, he took me out to dinner. I know it wasn't supposed to be a date, but it was date like, with opening my door and paying for me, and even momentarily holding my hand. It was like magic.'_

Okay. Maybe if I go a little farther back… I flip back to the near end of the book.

_'Today, I was at the park with Nash and he showed up, and for a split second, I honestly believed he was going to kiss me, right there, on the bench. My cheeks flamed red and all he did was shrug and walk away. What is wrong with me?'_

_'I hate him! I can't wait til I go back to school. I need to get away from him. He's driving me insane lately. He's been nitpicking my outfits and criticizing all my friends. I think he's angry because his dad's D.O.D. is close, but he doesn't have to take it out on me.'_ I skim the page a little further, to the last date and-

**HOLE-Y PAJAMAS.**

_'Last night, he snuck into my room. I pretended to be asleep at first, but he can read right through me. He slid under the covers next to me and wrapped his arms around me. No hanky-panky, none. But it was enough to make shiver. "I know you're up, Mel.' He said to me, 'and I know you're upset. I know you hate sneaking around like this." 'Sneaking around?' I yelled, 'There is no 'us' for there to be any sneaking around. We haven't done anything! Nothing! A little hand holding, a couple of non-official dates, and you sneaking in my room to talk and fall asleep with me in your arms."_

_'"Melanie," he turns me over, "I love you. Not only do I love you, but I'm in love with you." And he kisses me. He KISSED **ME**! He told me he loved me. And I cried. I cried so much, and I think he cried too. This isn't fair. I've been waiting since I was seven years old to hear that he loved me, and now I realize that it's all bitter sweet, because this is the most forbidden love that I could ever find. Colin and I are fighting the odds.'_

Colin.

Melanie is in love with Colin. Colin is in love with Melanie.

Finally, what Colin said about me 'having no idea' really hit.

I sat on the floor for the longest time, absorbing the whole thing.

"What are you doing in Melanie's room?" Nash peeks in from the doorway, curious.

"Uh, nothing really. Done playing with cars?"

"Yes ma'm. You left your phone in my bedroom. A girl named Carly called for you." I checked; one missed call, one text.

Carly – You weren't in school today again Sam. Where are you? I'm worried.

Alright, now's the time to come clean.

Me – I know. I'm not coming back.

It takes her a few seconds to respond.

Carly – come back to what?

Me – Seattle

Carly – SAM! You're not even in Seattle? Did you run away again? Where are you!

Worry. Carly always worries.

Me – I told you, I'm safe here… I'm at my dad's.

I relaxed a little. It was weight off my shoulders to let Carly know the truth.

Carly – WHAT? WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME! YOU GOTTA COME BACK!

Me – Uh, no can do Carls. I was kicked out because of you and Freddie's lie in the first place. I wasn't planning on burdening you with me because of it.

Okay, so maybe that was a little harsh, but I couldn't help it.

Carly – Oh my gosh. We gotta figure out a plan! I'll get Freddie and Gibby and Spencer over here to figure something out

I groaned. Carly and her 'plans to save the day' were so cliché. I was sick of her solving everything. She's not gonna be the hero this time.

Me – No. No plans. I'm staying here. Gotta go.

I could practically hear her pout from the thousands of miles away.

I literally did have to go though. I heard the front doorbell ringing and needed to get to it before Nash answered.

I open the door carelessly, and then my eyes snap open wide.

"Sam."

**SLAM. **

I threw the door closed right in Freddie's face.

_Knocking. _"Sam, Come on. Open up. We need to talk."

I opened the door, clenching my teeth in a way so that my jaw wouldn't fall to the ground in shock.

"What the Hell are you doing here! And more importantly, how the Hell did you get this address?" I start screaming in his face.

Absolutely none of my friends know where my dad's house is. Not even Spencer or Carly.

Wait a second. I just talked to Carly. She just figured it out that I ran away. How in the world did Freddie figure it out?

Freddie opens his mouth to speak, and I beat him to it. "Oh my gosh, you talked to Melanie? You're talking to her again? Wow."

I was so ticked. SO ticked.

Freddie steps closer to me, and I start to swing the door to close it again.

"OW!" Of course. He _would_ step in between the door and doorframe to block it from closing. "Sam!" That'll leave a bruise.

I scoff and shrug, "That's just an edge of what you get for the Hell you put me through last week. I will never, EVER listen to what you have to say, Benson."

"I didn't talk to Melanie, Sam. I went to your house." He says, calmly.

What? My house?

"You talked to my mom?" My voice changed dramatically, my tone a lot more soft and I suddenly felt small.

"Of course, Sammy. I was worried about you." What? Where was hardheaded Freddie? Where was the boy that treated me like the scum of the Earth a few days ago?

I hear the backdoor slam, and I begin to freak out. Is stepmonster home already? Is she gonna kick Freddie out?

"Told you I wouldn't be gone for long, Sam." Relief. Its just Colin again.

Out of the corner of my eye, I see Freddie give off a strange look.

"Oh, I didn't know you had a visitor. My name's Colin." Colin's hand is out, and Freddie just kind of stares at it. "Uh, I'm her stepbrother?"

It finally registers in Freddie's mind and he relaxes. "Oh cool. I'm Freddie Benson. Tech producer on iCarly and Sam's friend."

Colin and him shake hands, and I see the smirk on Colin's face; he realizes who Freddie is to me.

"He is **NOT **my friend!" I say, and both of them freeze on the spot, unsure of what to do.

Colin scratches the back of his neck, and says, "Awk-ward. Uh, I'm going to go hang out in the kitchen. And Sam? Don't get blood on the carpet. Mom certainly would not be too happy. Play nice."

I narrowed my eyes at him. "Gee, thanks Col. Appreciate it."

And there I was alone with _him_.

"Uh. This is a nice house." Freddie starts saying, trying to break the uncomfortable silence.

"Cut the chizz, Benson. You talked to my mom?" I folded my arms across my chest, defiance evident.

He sighs and tells me about his travels to my mom's, and how she told him that she kicked me out. "She kicked you out because you ran away from Carly and I."

I turned away and mumbled, "It's more than that. I'm not the daughter she wants. I'm her disappointment."

"So, now you're going to come back with me, okay? I mean. I know you can't live back with your mom and all, but I'm sure Carly'll take you in. You're like her sister." He can't be serious!

"Get bent, Benson." I think I just stunned him, because it was like he expected me to just run back to Seattle with him and everything be hunky-dory.

F no.

"Sam, come on, we need you back there." His astonishment

"I just talked to Carly. She didn't know til like five minutes ago about me being here. First off, why aren't the both of you here? Second off, how did you even know to go to my mom's? You could've just called me or texted me." I point my finger in his face, waving it angrily.

"Listen. You said… you said that I wouldn't have to deal with you anymore. And then you didn't show up at school, and you hardly texted or talked to Carly. I'd rather get to the middle of things without having to skirt around the edges. I went to your house hoping to find you and talk things out. So now that I'm here, you've gotta come back. Carly's going crazy and Gibby can't carry the show. Listen, I'll even pay for a ticket. My mom racked up a ton of frequent flier miles from her national aggressive parent conferences through the years and so I can easily get free tickets. So get your things. You can stay at Carly's house and we can figure out things from there."

Was he being crazy? Just take off, like that? Run back to Seattle, and pretend everything is okay?

NO. I'm not going to give up that easily.

Of course, I want to go home, but now? I just got here.

"Get lost, Benson." I snarl, and he's confused. "I mean it. I don't need you around here. This is fine. I'm fine." I lied, easily. My head was so confused.

I closed my eyes for a second, and there flashes in my mind, my mom's speech of how she doesn't want me.

"Go back to where you came from. Tell Carly I said hi. Have fun with your life." The last statement I made faltered at best, it kind of sunk in that maybe I'd be losing Freddie from my life forever.

"Sam, please!" His eyes were pleading, and I had to turn my head away as I shoved him out the doorway.

"I'll miss you, Freddie." I said it near whisper, but I saw his expression change, confirmation of his listening skills.

With that, I slammed the door in his face. He pounded on it a couple times, and then a few minutes later, I heard a taxi drive up and take him away.

I sat with my back to the door, and started crying, head in my hands.

Colin came in from the kitchen, immediately concerned to see me the way I was. "Sam! What happened?"

"Melanie was right. Forbidden love is the worst of all love." All I could think of were those piercing eyes, begging me to go with him.

What did I do?

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**A/N: Aha! I bet you didn't see that one coming. No, I was planning on this, I didn't want Sam to just run into Freddie's arms just because he flew all the way to see her. Besides, Sam doesn't even know yet that Freddie and Carly have broken up. If you noticed, Freddie didn't even mention it to her.  
And what did you guys think about the Melin? (Colin/Melanie haha) Maybe perfect Melanie isn't so perfect, finally Sam realized that she can identify with her and her true weakness. Twins do think alike at times.  
**

**Also: Just Another Random Reader, you hit the nail right on the head. I used to be a Dasey addict far before before I even knew iCarly existed. I found it perfect to add a little touch of the effect in this story, to bring a new light to the meaning of forbidden love. **

**And, to anyone, I need a name for Sam's dad. And I need a name of the location where Sam's at. Nothing too famous but nothing too secluded; somewhere far enough to take a plane ride to but at the same time you could take a loooong bus ride to or from Seattle to there. Suggestions? **

**Thank you to all of my readers and reviewers. Your reviews and viewcount on these chapters make me the happiest girl ever. Thank you thank you thank you! **

**Lots of Love,**

**iHearU!**


	11. Don't Mind If I Do

_A/N: I'm so sorry, guys; since the last update, I've had terrible writers block. I was even a little negative from the small amount of response from the previous chapter, until I received major inspiration from a reader - (hisdarkmaster) - and I can't help but be thankful for their push and positive feedback. Legit, I cried._

_Lately, I've been stumbling with everything in my life, my schoolwork and college life, my personal life and my love life has become outright harsh. But, I promise you all that I **WILL **finish this story. I have mapped out plans, too! I know that not many people care about this story since the huge hiatus, my personal writers block, but this was important to me, and I will finish it for my own benefit. I know iOMG and many other crucial things have happened.. but this story was written far before those amazing days. I hope you'll enjoy regardless!_

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**Chapter 11 – Don't Mind If I Do**

Was I crazy for refusing Freddie's offer? The week and a half then since then have been pretty awful. Carly's upset I didn't go with Freddie back to his house, Freddie hasn't spoken to me, and Gibby keeps telling me he's busy every time I call.

Dinners at the Puckett household have been revolting. No, the food has been really good – Ellie and I get along well – but you-know-who causes issues.

No, not Voldemort.

Cindy.

Lately, she's been trying to pry into my life as much as she digs into Colin's. Did you know that when Colin leaves his backpack around somewhere, she'd unzip it and dump out all of its contents, searching for grades that she can lecture him about? And I thought Mrs. Benson was bad. How much I would kill for her to be my mom instead of my 'real' one and the fake one I've gotten right now…

I've got a ton of respect for Colin after seeing Cindy in action. Colin balances top grades, highest positions in his athletics, and extra-curricular activities, outstanding in them all, and his mother barely acknowledges it. All she ever tells him is that he can do better. Never once out of her mouth has a "good job, Colin!" or even an "I'm proud of you!" escaped. He's scored winning points for his teams, ranked highest for his school projects and gained awards for volunteering around the community. Where is the, "I love you", too? I cringe because I notice Nash getting the praise and showered with the love that Nate's not.

Nash is slightly starting to adapt to my ways. When I watch over him, he laughs at my stories and we came up with a secret little handshake. I told him that if he ever came to Seattle to visit me someday when I go back home, I'd take him to Galinni's for pie and to the Groovy Smoothie so he could see various foods on a stick. Nate's got a bit of Puckett in him, no matter how much his mom wants to stomp it out of him – he's already gotten big dreams of travelling.

The father figure here in the household has yet to withhold any type of in-depth conversation with me. Vague questions, of how my days at the hell school have been going, are about the extent of the father daughter relationship we have. He hasn't approached me about moving here, asked about my mother, or anything else relatively paternal since I've been here. It's work, dinner, office, an hour of TV, then bed, I think. Why is it that Melanie used to think that this place was so amazing, making it seem to me like it would be fairytale-like?

Tonight, I'm going to approach my father about everything. Make him step up and be a man for once. Stand up for Colin and I. Of course, I'll have to pull him aside when Cynthia isn't glaring me down – she'd never let me stand a chance next to him.

After helping Ellie with the dishes (much to the disgust of Cindy, "that's her job, Samantha! That's what we're paying her for!") I waited until the monster was parked in front of the TV to slip into the office. Typically, he didn't even notice me come in, until I sat in the desk's adjacent chair and tapped on the wood.

"Oh, uh, hi Samantha. What's up?"

I gave him a look, and he kind of scrunched up his face, confused, so I continued on. "Listen. I don't get why you brought me here. Your lovely wife isn't doing chizz to help this situation."

"And what situation are we talking about here?"

My turn to shoot him a confusing look. Seriously? Is he that idiotic?

"Oh, I don't know, maybe that my life has become severely ruined? Since I've been here, she's been nothing but insensitive to me. She's smothering not only me, but Colin and Nash as well. Have you paid any attention to how much stress Nate is under? It's like he can never be good enough. And it's like you just let her push everyone around. You just sit around and work on business and grin and bear it. It's like you don't even realize anything in your own home. I might look like Melanie, but I'm not her, so when you take me here and expect everything to just 'fit' as if I was, you really let me down." I stare at my feet.

My father looks at a loss for words, and rummages through his desk drawer.

"Here, Samantha. Take the spare keys to Melanie's car. You're not registered on the insurance, but I can get that cleared up in a few days."

This is worse than I thought. "Seriously? You're handing me keys to run away from her? Newsflash, dad. I don't have my license. I don't even have my temps!"

"What in the world has Pam been doing? Not teaching you how to drive, that's ridiculous."

"Yeah, there's a lot that you don't know about how I've grown up. Seriously, you live your rich life sending mom and I minimum child support; I haven't even got a birthday card from you since you moved out. Mom doesn't care about what I do and where I go, she goes and finds a guy who can suit her needs. Majority of that time, she pretends she doesn't have a daughter. She claims that having a daughter when being in the dating scene is like carrying an extra purse; unnecessary and unattractive. How do you think that makes me feel, knowing that my father doesn't acknowledge I exist, and then realizing my mother does it too? Where is there any fairness involved in that? I'm still always searching. I dreaded coming here, dad. I hate how Cindy treats me. I hate how you treat me. I was given the opportunity to go home with one of my friends the other day, but you know what? I didn't take it."

His face was sunk; finally, my words were hitting him.

"Listen," I continued, "I know you didn't want me to come here in the first place. And honestly, if I weren't at my last resort, I wouldn't've. But I am. You need to start listening. Stop standing around and letting Cindy ruin the rest of our lives. You wouldn't let mom, so what makes her any different?"

"Sam, things are different than when you were little. I'm in a great place financially. A mother is supposed to run a home. Cindy just wants the best for her children. She may be a little rough around the edges, but her best intentions are at heart."

I swallowed a huge lump in my throat, "That's what you used to say about mom when she yelled at us."

He looked at a loss for words, and came up with the generic statement, "Just give her a chance, Sam."

I stormed out of the room, bitter and more irritated than when I began in the first place. I miss home. I miss Frothy – I hope that she didn't claw up the fridge too bad, that mother actually realizes she needs food every so often.

I pull my phone from my pocket, wondering whom I could call without too many problems.

"Spencer? What's up?" I kept my tone airy and light, I didn't want to set off any alarms.

"Sam! Is that really you? Oh! Or is this Melanie? If this is Melanie I'm sorry for confusing you for Sam. Wait. If this is Sam then I'm sorry for confusing you for Melanie but I thought it was you in the first place but uh, uhhh. Who is this?"

"Slow down, you were right the first place. It's Sam." I hear him breath a sigh of relief.

"How's Seattle?" I ask, timidly, even though I really don't want to know how amazing everyone is without me.

"Uh. Hmm. Carly hasn't said much lately that I could tell you about. I'm working on a sculpture. Its full of remotes – Freddie wasn't thrilled about that one." He stops, realizing he made a mistake. "Aw man, I'm sorry Sam. I forgot for a second."

"It's fine," I say, "I'm fine." I think he realizes that I'm saying it for my own wellbeing.

"Yeah well. Uh. Gibby's been over here a lot lately. I think Carly's tutoring him." A small smile creeps up on my face. I can only imagine how much frustration she's put herself into.

"What subject is she tutoring him in?" I miss Ridgeway's wacky projects; the school I'm at now is just rigid and dull.

"mmmm, ahhh… I can't remember." I hear some rustling, and then…

"CARLAYYYYY!"  
I jump back, my ear temporarily deaf and ringing in discomfort from the high decibel scream for his sister.

I immediately switch my phone in my hands, now cradling it against my other ear.

I hear a faint "whaat!" from Carly, apparently upstairs yelling down.

In a quick moment, I think – uh oh. Spencer could tell Carly I'm on the phone. Yeah, I know, I've given her minimal detail of where I am and how I am, but that's how it needs to be. If I hear more about her and Freddie or how she wants to come get me, I'll scream.

"What're you studaaaying up there with gibbaaay?" The stress on the "A" sound is enough to get me to roll my eyes.

Silence.

I check my phone to make sure it hasn't dropped my call.

"Chemistry." I hear.  
"Sam, you still here? Carly said she and Gibby are working on chemistry."

I laugh at this. If the two of them thought of how silly that sounds, they'd probably be embarrassed at the implication.

"So," Spencer asks, "How's being an official "Puckett" at the estate?" Spencer's innocent question brings me over the edge.

"Puckett?" I sneer, "Don't call me that. I sure as hell don't want to live up to that family name."

"That bad?" I hear the empathy itching up in his voice

"My stepbrothers are okay. It's the older people that I don't get."

"I know. Hang in there, Sam. Things have a way of working themselves out."

Yeah, I want to say, and then become ten times worse.

"Listen, before you hang up, I wanted to let you know that Freddie has been pretty upset since whatever happened at your house." I stiffen. "He won't talk about it to Carly either, since it was around the same time the two of them broke up."

What? WHAT?

"Excuse me?"

"Yeah, since Carly and Freddie broke up, he won't really talk about anything having to do with you. I think he doesn't want to mess up the shaky friendship the two of them have anymore."

It hits him after eight seconds more.

"Oh my gosh, Sam. No! No one told you! Lalalalala I didn't say anythiiiinggg!"

"Bye, miss you." I hang up the phone and just sit there, shaking.

The whole reason I'm here is because of THEM. Together.

Why am I the one to have to deal with the collateral, when they didn't even last?

Needless to say, I didn't get any sleep that night.

I wake up, the next morning, relieved it's the weekend. I didn't have to do anything; no one was forcing me out of my comfort zone. I check my phone, slightly surprised, two missed calls from Melanie. I shrug it off, figuring I'll call her back after I'm awake and cleaned up, regardless the fact its still really early in the day.

There are a few seconds when reality sinks back in; Carly and Freddie aren't together. They're not dating any longer. Not the relationship that tore me to pieces, lead to the downward spiral of my life.

Wait.

Woah woah woah.

My first thoughts regarding their breakup have been constant, and in a sense, selfish, but waking up must've cleared up what really should've been running through my mind.

Freddie came here for YOU. He wasn't dating CARLY when he was asking YOU back.

My mind began to race. Did Carly know? Is she upset about it? Did she tell him to try again? Will they be back together because I didn't leave with him?

"Sam or Melanie?" I hear a voice say, down the hall. I roll my eyes. Don't they realize I'll never be Melanie?

"It's Sa-" I begin to say, walking out to the hallway, when I get cut off, noticing the shimmery blonde hair and sparkling pink shoes.

Okay. Maybe it's not Sam.

I duck behind a doorway to watch, knowing that either Melanie or Colin, who posed the question in the first place, haven't spotted or heard me yet.

"What are you doing here?" Colin says in a hushed tone, his eyes darting around the hallway, hoping for a moment of privacy.

"My dad called me last night, saying I should come up for the weekend and spend some time with Sam, that things aren't going that great here. Something about stepmom, not adjusting to school well, and the fact she doesn't have her license."

I roll my eyes at the last part; in Seattle, I don't really need my license when school, Carly's apartment and the Groovy Smoothie is in walking distance.

"Why didn't you tell _me _that you were coming?" Colin's tone turns hurt, pouty in a sense.

"Colin, you know how difficult this is, the situation we're in. I don't want you spilling out how we've been sneaking around. Besides," a pause, "I wanted to surprise you."

I peak around the corner, and ah. Kissing.

I slide back into my room to give them a little privacy. I can talk to Melanie about whatever later. Peering through 'my' closet, I realized I needed to take a trip to the mall relatively soon, I was running out of clothes that didn't require frills or massive amounts of pink.

"EEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!"

Or, maybe not.

Running out into the hallway, it hits me.

"WHAT THE YUCK!"

OH NO.

"COLIN AND SAMANTHA!" Uh, excuse me? "What in the world is going on?"

"You came into my house and look what you're doing to my family? I warned your father that if you were going to stay here, you had better follow my rules, behave accordingly, and THIS. THIS **HERE!** I'm so disgusted at you corrupting your evil ways upon my son. I knew you were trouble from the start. We had no choice in taking you in, but we now have no choice but to ship you back. Seriously, juvenile delinquency that should put you in the foster care system-" She stops, my finger tapping on her shoulder from behind.

"hi." I'm shaking, hard, but I can't even form words.

She looks from me, to Melanie and Colin, back to me, and Nash is now trudging down the hall with sleepy eyes.

"YOU." She points a finger in my face, "my family was happy when you weren't here. Your hellion ways are inflicting upon your sister, look what you did!"

Melanie's standing there, tears streaming down her cheeks, ashamed and terrified, while Nate sits, face bright red, at a loss of words.

"You know what? They love each other. LOVE. Not some twisted plot created by me to piss you off, but something real, something they'll fight for. You love yourself too much to even realize that they've had something for each other for a long, long time. To keep them away from each other, that's just another twisted way you're manipulating and destroying your family. It wasn't a good thing that I came here, but you know what? Maybe you'll finally get the point."

"I'm not stupid, Samantha. I knew it was possible, why do you think I suggested her prep school in the first place?"

Then, like a time bomb,

_Boom._

"Are you serious? Mom! How could you!"

She rolls her eyes, scoffing at her son's comment.

"I love Melanie. You're not going to take her away from me, no matter what it takes. Ship her away; I'll go find her. Better yet, I'll run away. I'm graduating soon, and I've earned my way into any school. You don't care, you think I'm never good enough for anything. So either push me out or order me out, either way, I'm sticking with Mel."

This huge mess of emotions is blowing up in Cindy's face, and she just deadpans.

"Fine." She takes a sharp intake of breath, "Melanie. Go downstairs; sit in the living room. Colin, stay up here in your room. Um, Nash, darling, go down and have Ellie make you some breakfast, alrighty?" I raise my eyebrow. She saved me for last?

"You." She pulls me out of the room separately, closes the door to my room and stares straight at me. "Out. Of. My. House. Pack your bags, Samantha. You're no longer suitable to be living this house. Here's a hundred, go and leave, leave my family alone." Her frigid, emotionless tone sent chills down my spine, and as she watched me pack, I realized she wasn't kidding.

As I walked towards the front door, my backpack and a small bag filled, Nash ran towards me.

"Sammy! Don't leave!" And I was trying so hard not to cry.

"It's okay, Nash. I told you about the pie and smoothies, someday you can come see me."

"It's not fair. I want to come with you!" He latched on to my leg. I dropped down to his level, giving him a proper hug.

"Nash, listen to me. I'm always here for you if you need me. Do you want to do our handshake before I go?" I hear the taxi pulling up; I steady myself to pull off our little tradition. "And I have to admit. I like your name lots." A weary smile appears on his face. One more hug, and then I look around.

My sister runs and nearly tackles me in a hug, crying. "I love you, Sammy. I'm so so sorry. This is all my fault."

"Mel. Listen here. None of this is your fault. This is fate."

Colin hugs me as well, looking pretty guilty, visibly shaking with anger. "Thank you."

"No, Colin. Thank you."

I smile. Maybe my time here wasn't so bad.

I walk towards the door, held open by the witch herself. She wouldn't look at me, just shoved a box in my hand and made sure I was setting en route in the taxi.

"Goodbye Samantha."

"Bye Cindy."

The car rolled further away from the house, I let a few tears fall, looking down at my lap.

A package, I opened it carefully, pulling out its content.

The bright rectangle object immediately brought a smile to my face, knowing all of the good memories attached to it.

_Sam,_

_I couldn't let Spencer destroy this by sticking it in with every other remote he found in the apartment. This one is too important, like you._

_Te echo de menos – __**I miss you**_

_Freddie_

I guess I know where my first stop will be.

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A/N-_ Readers, if you've stuck with me this long, I applaud you. I haven't made it easy, but I have another chapter, maybe two of this story before I begin a new one (different show, different characters; still Dan Schneider.) Thank you for coming along with me in this wild rids of fanfictional proportion, I'll be writing the next chapter as you read this one! Review, let me know your thoughts, they're greatly appreciated._

_~Thank You! ihearu_


	12. You Found Me

_**Author's Note:** Alrighty guys, this is it! It took me a year to finish this story; but this is finally it. Holy bajezus! I just wanted to let my reviewers know that I made a total mistake (calling Colin Nate throughout chapter 11) and changed it the day after, thanks to a reviewer. I cannot believe I didn't catch it! Thanks for the tip though, lots of help. Thank you to all of my reviewers in advance, you do not have any idea how great of an influence you have had on me throughout the past year. Thank you, and i'll go ahead and say I love you all for it. _

* * *

Chapter 12 - You Found Me

Freddie P.O.V. :

I've been sitting around the past couple of days in a trance. Sam's been all I could think about. I never thought she could just decide to stay at some place she never wanted to be at. She really must hate my guts.

My mom's been freaking out about the condition I'm in; "Freddie's illness", she calls it. She wants me to stay at home and recover, but all its making me do is ruminate on the situation. If I don't play my cards right around her, she's going to send me off to an institution.

Yet, I can't face going back over to Carly's all the time. Things aren't as easy as we thought they'd be after we broke up. It's all awkward, let alone the fact she's angry and confused about why Sam didn't come back with me (and why I went there alone, without consulting her first). Carly's still pretty angry about the whole Gibby ordeal, but it's mellowed down after I treated the both of them to Groovy Smoothies and Gallini's pies.

_Samsamsamsamsam_. Her name keeps resounding through my head, throbbing like a heartbeat. No matter what, I just can't shake the feeling of it. I did something wrong, there's no doubt about it, but the fact that I can't fix it is tough to grasp. I gave it the best shot I possibly could, and failed.

Walking into the kitchen, I pick up the bread and begin rooting through my fridge, trying to make a sandwich I know I won't eat. I've been trying to eat, honest, but no matter how twisted it sounds, my brain pairs up food and Sam together.

I pile the sandwich up as much as I can, throwing anything appetizing I find on it.

Ugh. It's a Sam-mich.

I stare at the plate for a few seconds, half admiring my handiwork, half disgusted that I've wasted all of these ingredients.

I pick up the masterpiece and begin to walk into the living room, hoping to acquire an appetite when the doorbell rings.

Carly, Spencer or Gibby. I don't even hesitate to open the door or bother to look through the peephole.

"Can I have that?" My heart leaps in my chest and I shove the sammich at her.

"And a hello to you too, Benson." Instead of the usual negative, sarcastic demeanor, she sports a brave half smile.

"Sam!" I grab her and pull her into a tight hug, carefully not shoving the sammich in the process.

We walk into my apartment, close the door.

"So what's up? How's Seattle?" She asks, gingerly, as if she's afraid I'll snap at her.

I smile sheepishly and say, "Sleepless."

She gives me the one-over, noticing my sloppy appearance.

"Yeah, sleepless doesn't seem to cover it. Chiz, Freddie. You look almost as bad as when you got ran over by the taco truck! What happened?"

"Uh, yeah, about that. My partner-in-crime got screwed over by some delusional guy, who thought he could date her best friend and get away with it, freak out towards her about his own insecurities, and pretty much ruin her life. He pretty much hates himself for it." I say, my cheeks glowing red. "Why are you here? I thought you wanted nothing to do with us? With me?"

She shrugs, looking me square in the eye and says, "You were the one who told me not to run away… So after I got kicked out of yet another home, I realized that Bushwell is the only place I belong." I kind of stare at her; aiming to process this information. "Oh, and thanks for the remote."

I kind of got all giddy at that point, hugging her again, motioning for her to put down her sammich and then I drag her by the hand across the hall. Knocking, I feel her hand squeeze mine, and I squeeze hers back, for reassurance purposes.

"Freddie?" Carly pulls open the door and begins screaming and jumping when she sees Sam.

"SAM! Spencer! Gibby! Sam's back!" She calls out, as all three of us are jumping up and down together, laughing.

Stopping to breathe, Carly looks at me and says, "Freddie, you did it! You brought her back!"

I start to laugh harder and poof.

Um, woah.

Carly grabs me and plants one on my lips, a good five seconds long, with me standing frozen in place.

I feel the warmth of Sam's hand disappear, my eyes are wide open, watching her flee up the steps to the studio, the door slamming.

Carly backs up, a horrified look on her face, mimicking mine, Gibby's and even Spencer's.

"I… I don't…But…I didn't even – and, no!" She splutters out nonsense, in her mind justifying her bizarre actions, the magnitude of what just occurred glaring onto the situation.

The puzzle pieces click. Gibby likes Carly. Sam likes me. Carly, despite what just happened, I think likes Gibby.

I hope.

And **me**?

My heart is beating to the pattern of Sam's name.

Once the visible shock of the state of affairs wore off, I was running up the stairs after her.

"SAM! SAAAMMM!" I'm knocking with full force on the studio door, silently begging for it to open. I'm staring all around the room searching for her, and I feel desperation, as I don't see her.

Finally, I give up and kick the doorframe, which, with much resistance, finally shudders open.

"Screw you, Benson." Her arms are wrapped around her knees, she's on the floor next to the doorway, and exactly the reason I couldn't see her.

"Sam." I sit down so I can be exactly on her level, she scooches away, refusing to look at me. "Sam, look at me."

She doesn't look at me, but she quits straining her head away from mine.

"That's why you brought me here? To show me off, to get back together with Carly?" My heart sinks, her voice sounded so small, so broken.

"NO! Don't even think that for a second! I wanted you to come over so Carly could be happy that you're back." She sinks a little bit more, "Nooo, that came out wrong. Stupid. Freddie. UGH!" I slam my fist down in defeat; she looks up at me.

"I'm sorry I'm not as pretty as her. I'm not as smart as her. I got kicked out of both of my homes. My dad didn't care to get to know me, my mom doesn't care to have me around, and my sister didn't care to stick up for me. I'm HOMELESS at seventeen! All I ever did was fall for you and look where that lead me."

Tears were falling; I could tell she was trying the hardest she could to just keep composed for my sake. I grab her and pull her into my arms as she sobs, hard and loud, into my chest.

"I'm here, Princess Puckett. I don't want to be with Carly. It was you, all along. It'll always be you. You are perfect to me. We'll get through this together." I whisper into her ear as I stroke her hair gently.

She pulls out of the embrace slowly, and I take this opportunity.

I kiss her.

This is no kiss like our scared, tentative first kiss. This is not a kiss that Carly aimed giving me, smashing her lips on mine.

No, this kiss was real. Fueled by passion, revelation, and understanding.

"Sam I'm so so-" I hear Carly, screeching, and Sam's about to pull away, so I grab the back of her head and pull her in deeper. I feel her intake of breath at this surprise of me acting so forward, but she doesn't attempt to move back.

I hear her footsteps leave quickly, "SPENCER! GET THE CAMERA." The kissing stops, and Sam and I look at each other and laugh. I hug her again; I cannot get enough of this girl.

"Soooo." I say, a smug look rising on my face; I cannot help but feel like a big weight has been lifted.

"You really mean it when you said you wanted to help?"

"Of course. I'll help you with whatever you need." She looks grateful at this, a rarity.

Before Carly comes back up the steps, I try to explain to her about Carly and Gibby.

She gets wide eyed – "Chemistry! They have 'chemistry' together!" She laughs and I can see in her eyes that it's finally clicked.

"Sam, you dropped your phone downstairs." Carly comes walking back into the room, arm covering her eyes, waving the phone wildly.

"Haha, its okay Carly, open your eyes."

"I'm so sorry." She looks mortified, and terrified.

"Quit apologizing, Shay, you're going way too soft." Finally, things begin to realign in the right order.

Sam looks at her phone, and has a sharp intake of breath. "Shit. My dad called."

I hear the voicemail; Sam's brave enough to put it on speaker for all three of us to hear.

"Listen Sam, Melanie and I had a long talk, and I realized that I was completely wrong. Cindy should have never sent you away, I am so sorry for that. I want to apologize for not being in your life – but I've known from the start that you are a strong girl who will persevere through all of life's shortcomings. I talked to your mother today, who apparently has been trying to call but she gave the last copy of our address to some "steamy hunk of high school" that was trying to reach you. She misses you too, Sam. Things are going to be different from now on; you and I will spend more time together, Melanie will no longer be attending boarding school, and I will absolutely, one hundred percent promise that your mother and you will work everything out. I love you, Sammy, call me back when you get this."

I take her hand back into mine, and squeeze it; she grabs Carly's and does the same.

"Okay guys, lets not get all sappy now." Sam sticks out her tongue at us, and we're back to our happy, carefree state...

With Sam and I finally where we belong: Together.

* * *

_**A/N**: It's been such a long journey, but thank you, everyone, especially to those who've stuck through this from the beginning. This is my first story that I've completed on fanfiction, and the highest amount of reviews and hits - more than i've ever imagined.  
Keep your eyes peeled; I'm going to continue writing stories and such!  
_

_Thank You! _

_- iHearU _


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